14:56 did the mayans eat fried chicken? 14:56 they were a fairly advanced civilization: i think we can safely assume that they did 11:49 History is creative writing with strict rules and research. 17:03 i agree with noah. ms and verisign: just as evil, but verisign is only able to aspire to the profane horrors that ms does daily. 17:04 <_rjones> netscape seems more like darth vader's weird uncle's attempt to build a death star from old vw parts. 09:56 to me, toilets are a fine example of a technology best left analog. 09:19 we've had to terminate the mars missions because something big and hungry ate the rover. on the bright side, we've discovered life on mars. "Cutting the space budget really restores my faith in humanity. It eliminates dreams, goals, and ideals and lets us get straight to the business of hate, debauchery, and self-annihilation." -- Johnny Hart 09:15 nothing says "neighborhodd coffee joint" like having a blue light in the customer bathroom so the junkies can't find the vein. 11:24 oh my god all you people have kids 11:24 and...? 11:25 hahaha 11:25 omg 11:25 s/kids/semifinalists for the role of the Antichrist/ 09:23 the pink flamingo is the tallest flying bird 09:24 And the most useful as a croquet mallet. 11:08 omg 11:08 i hella had a awesome hookup thanks to death guild 11:08 THANK YOU DG AND ALL YOUR GOTHYNESS 11:08 KEK 11:08 oh yeah? 11:08 find a nice insecure girl? 11:09 yes :) 11:09 my favorite kind 11:09 i like it when the mascara runs because they are crying 11:09 :) 11:09 joe: good luck sir 11:09 you're not very pretty, but i'm bored 10:30 being an adult fucking sucks ass. 13:52 you can't fail if you don't have a way to quantify failure ;) 09:50 i just stuck a pentium 4 inside sticker on my crusoe laptop 09:51 right where the crusoe sticker used to be. 09:51 suddenly it feels slower. 09:17 (09:16:17) BE SURE TO LOG ONTO 09:17 (09:16:18) CNN.COM/FIGHTINGTERROR. 09:17 (09:16:19) ONCE YOU'RE THERE, YOU CAN GET 09:17 (09:16:21) AN INTERACTIVE TIME LINE OF AL 09:17 (09:16:22) QAEDA ATTACKS 09:18 65 million BC: Al-Qaeda suicide bombers pilot their time machine into the yucatan peninsula, destroying the dinosaurs and providing islam with the Sacred Black Stone of the Ka'Aba. 14:17 odo, i wonder if it isn't some code built to work on sparc and its aligned access requirements? 14:18 phone i'd wonder the same thing except that i've found other unaligned accesses in the jvm interpreter 14:18 well that doesn't mean there isn't code elsewhere :) 14:19 that reminds me of "the story of mel" 14:20 i love that story 14:20 > mmmmm. 14:20 that's a fine story 14:21 > for people who haven't read it: http://redirx.com/?geiy 14:22 is this the modern equivalent of tribesmen sitting around a fire eating weasels and saying "hey remember that story about uncle thag the hunter?" 14:23 "the bow and arrow hadn't been invented yet but even if it had thag would have refused to use it" 20:11 it sounds like zz-top in a blender with garth brooks 20:11 it's so redneck it makes me want to lynch myself 15:03 i am on the strangest conference call ever 15:03 i am working on oracle and talking about elk meat 08:54 my cat spammed me 08:54 miaowmiaowmiaowmiaowmiaowviagramiaowmiaowmiaowmiaow 08:57 heh 08:57 well the spam was from "Pendleton" 08:57 so i can only assume it was him. 09:05 there's no other possible explanation! 10:15 omg 10:15 I just got a popup ad asking if I wanted to be taller 10:15 that's not what they mean by "add inches", dear. 14:38 is that a cod in your pocket or are you just surreptitiously fucking a trout? 14:39 "Troutfucker - the new style for autumn" 14:39 that's not an erection -- that's a penis-mounted fish! 10:34 never thought it was possible, but sounds to me so far like doom3 is both old and busted, AND the new hotness. 15:16 I can't concentrate today 15:17 stay reconstituted then 10:27 Syn/ack/syn/ack/oh oh syn/yes YES ACK ACK BABY, GOD YES AAAACCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!! 09:08 there's an old management trick where you kill one of your workers and put his head on public display on a spike 13:38 YOU: PLEASINGLY PLUMP OR PLUS-SIZED THALIDOMIDE BABY, NONSMOKER, SOCIAL DRINKER. YOUR FLIPPERS ARE KEPT OILED AND YOU LIKE IT IN THE ASS. ME: EXHIBITIONISTIC AGORAPHOBIC WITH LARGE PHONE BILL AND CATARACTS 13:38 LET'S MAKE A BABY. NO FREAKS 08:43 If it weren't for GI Joe, we'd all be speaking Cobra. dude, if i bled chocolate, i'd be captain self-mutilation. 09:23 I do not understand the concept of blocking web sites 09:23 You're an adult. Either block the internet entirely, or expect people to exercise some judgement. 09:24 this is America. self-responsibility belongs to everyone else but you 20:39 i'd hate to fuck someone and have my penis get stuck in their vagina 20:39 i mean, it'd be nice for about a day 08:59 omg! 09:00 i am such a horrible cook, i can't even make toaster waffles! 09:00 this is so gross! 09:00 let them boil too long? 11:53 by the way, there were entirely too many furries at burning man this year. 17:43 am i the only one that finds the snack "cheese nips" offensive? 17:43 not only am i lactose intolerant, it's an ethnic slur! isosceles: at the annual town fair today, some kid was pestering my daughter, after a comical shoving match began, she steps back and screams, "uzbek eagle" with teh claw, the little kid she was fighting with cried and ran away 11:17 omg people think i beat my woman 11:18 isosceles: you mean you don't? GOTTA KEEP HER IN LINE 11:18 was the endboss hard? 11:18 nah, she had a corneal abrasion and her eye got all swoll' up somefin fierce like 11:19 so of course her first reaction is, hey, take pics with the camera phone and send it to everyone with the caption "i had to tell her twice" 11:37 damnit i wish i could smoke bowls at my desk 11:37 dr.pox: to make people think you're interviewing? 20:54 HOW CAN THERE BE OTHER THINGS THAN VAGINAL FISTING 12:35 I want LEDs powered by my body fat 12:35 maybe in my eyeballs 08:56 was the name of my band in high school 08:56 pot banana was the name of my band in high school 08:57 subtle come-on was the name of my band in high school 08:57 heh, everything is plausible! 08:58 that was the name of my band in high school 08:59 " that was the name of my band in high school" was the name of my band in high school. weird, eh? 08:59 Y'all so meta. 10:02 LAST NIGHT WHILE I WAS ASLEEP MY BONER DEVELOPED A SIMPLE CHAT SYSTEM. 10:03 dude the internet is awesome 14:32 I wonder if keeping a copy of Ashcroft's CD would be like a get-out-of-TSA-Strip-Search-free card 09:06 he kinda reminds me of the "bug" alien in Men In Black, the one that had the "Edgar suit" 09:06 i bet if you tried to stab cheney he'd fall apart and cockroaches and rats would spew out of the wound and his eyes and mouth 09:06 anyways, i just watched "return of the jedi" so i have an idea how the debate will play out 10:56 whatever you get up to in the relative privacy of your own cubicle is entirely between you and a vengeful all-knowing mantis-god 11:21 the problem with san francisco is that over time every possible combination of words in the english language becomes a euphemism for some horrific gay sex act. "navy style" "cave looter" "mayonnaise jar" 16:16 my proposed solution (operation speak french or die) was poorly received by both the united nations and the european parliament, so fuck you all, i give up 16:23 In 1997 a proposal was made by Michael Everson to encode the characters of the Klingon language in Plane 1 of ISO/IEC 10646-2. The proposal was rejected in 2001 as "inappropriate for encoding" not because the proposal 16:23 was technically faulty, but because users of Klingon normally read and write and exchange data in Latin transliteration 16:24 SUCK IT, TREKKIES 14:25 gee it's a good thing we sold our shares of google. we might have accidentally doubled our money 10:29 "When you go to war over religion, you're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend." 20:14 13:48 Richard M. Stallman, Linus Torvalds, and Donald E. Knuth engage in a discussion on whose impact on the computerized world was the greatest. Stallman: 20:14 + "God told me I have programmed the best editor in the world!" Torvalds: "Well, God told *me* that I have programmed the best operating system in the world!" Knuth: 20:14 + "Wait, wait - I never said that." I hear George Lucas is working on a new version of LotR. I have been very close to coming back on channel but I usually get some skin of my scrotum stuck in my zipper and that makes me see stars and pass out before I can muster the courage. 14:04 i love how the people that live in bumfuck redneckistan are so concerned about terrorism. cuz like, YEAH, the jihad against swatchs of empty land and corn is IN FULL GEAR 22:12 ghetto booty expands towards you as you look at it, but shtetl booty expands to either side 22:33 cock is a gateway drug! 09:05 sendmail appears to be working correctly. can you tell me what i've done wrong? 10:31 just in case it wasn't clear, no one should believe me ever 11:46 hhgttg is in may 11:46 as is the soon-to-suck-episode-3 11:47 it won't be a total waste of time if they unleash another costume-rending monster on natalie portman 12:56 yes, believe it or not - weezyl does stop sucking sometimes. 10:41 surely according to moore's law by 2014 chip transistor density will be nearing the point where every pentium XIV chip has its own little event horizon 14:29 <+usrbingeek> NBC has announced it will air a three-episode marathon of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy opposite the Super Bowl on February 1st. 14:29 <+usrbingeek> So, if you get tired of watching a bunch of buff, sweaty men in uniforms patting each other on the ass and bending over to pass something between their legs, you now have the choice of watching something really gay. 11:03 Exactly what sort of omniscient narrator voice relies on a 20-letter word to describe mildly heavy petting? 19:40 Worst answer to "implement itoa" ever: "char *str = (char *) &i;" 19:41 Worst answer to "what's wrong with your implementation of itoa" ever: "Oh! It has a endianness issue." 19:42 On another note. If anyone in the bay area is proficient in Unix C system programing, we're hiring. 19:43 for "does not implement itoa that way" amounts of proficient. 13:08 oo use your man part as a puppet 23:02 old_major: i'm not gay, but would you suck my cock? 23:02 old_major: then we can shoot some hoops, do some manly stuff 23:02 twid: whaddya know! I'm not gay too! We should discuss this over sodomy some time. 12:44 hep would have an e-funeral 16:19 the idea of jack valenti and mike eisener being forced to painfully sodomize each other for all eternity makes me feel all warm and cozy inside. 15:40 <_> perhaps Javascript::RPC is what i want 11:18 some things, some people, do not deserve my love, and e robs me of the ability to discern. plus, there's the MAJOR fucked up seratonin impalances that last for days or weeks 11:18 hella not worth it 11:19 gimme a couple of tabs or a handful of shroom caps. i might be talking to a 7 foot pink bunny rabbit but at least i'll know how i really feel about it. 16:50 ok, didn't realize I had the final drafts 16:50 when they are final, they are not drafts. 17:16 the dog and the cats have conversations. they go like this: HI!!! WANNA PLAY???? wtf? CMON!! LETS PLAY!!! Sssssss! oh ok maybe later. 08:32 maybe that's why bush keeps invading the middle east. he wants the standard character set to be iso8859-1, not utf8 14:47 perl is broken in bizzare ways. 13:17 will someone please tell me why Mandrake's openssh package doesn't come with /usr/bin/ssh ? 12:58 i like my pancakes like i like my women - unsavory and sort of cold. 22:18 <_> i was skeptical about OO at first but i think the problem was just C++ 17:24 But I think me being "thin" is simply not genetically happening. Centuries of fine Polish peasant engineering went into this set of chromosomes. 20:49 I want a horse cock in EACH hand. 10:54 if only a gigantic walking octopus would come along and strangle the entire nutjob religious right 10:59 The more I work at this job, the more I am determined that someday I am going to snap, scream "The emperor has no motherfucking clothes and the Republican party sucks cock by choice," walk out of here, and prostrate myself in front of the most liberal, feminist-supporting organization that will let me lick their envelopes without chastising me for loving a good steak. 18:00 it makes me hot when I switch buffers and chance upon serendipitous perl code 10:27 i don't remember how it came up, but my first graders and i were talking today about my friend rachel who doesn't eat food that's cooked 10:27 the kids were pretty sure she's going to die 10:27 if just from the lack of chicken fingers 21:58 tcl is your daddy! 14:28 is there a bureau of coordinates? 14:30 ministry of locations 14:30 ministry of longitude 14:31 I wonder if the ministry of longitude and the ministry of latitude work well together 14:31 their missions are orthogonal 16:58 Mike, what do you think about the PSP's egronomics? 16:59 I think they're horrible. it's really hard for me to play with Maggie's hands covering the buttons. 14:14 I actually have a story about someone date-raping themselves with GHB. 14:15 heh 14:15 what, "I was so high I forgot I'd already wanked a lot that day?" 14:15 that's a lotta wanking 14:15 hahahaha 14:15 post this story, siva. 14:16 A gay male friend/roommate-of-a-lover was on his day off, decided to get buzzed, dosed himself, got horny, and started working a plug/dildo into his ass. 14:17 Passes out from the GHB, wakes up N time interval later with his underwear on the floor and something in his butt, and no memory of how he got there. 14:17 hahahaha 14:17 > hahahahahaha 14:17 hahahahaha 14:17 I must have sat on it. 14:17 HEH 14:17 "I was bored." 14:17 Anyway, he went into his room to clean up, and his roommate arrived home ten minutes later on her lunch break. 14:18 hahaha 14:18 Was puzzled by the underwer on the floor, and asked him about it, which is how the story came out. 22:47 yay this is like stuffing an odo into my router 10:57 a day of new software without bugs is like drinking the water in south america without getting dysentery 17:32 ha, you people and your square-profile tires 10:10 also, hurray for the space program 10:12 Russia's federal space agency will offer a $100m trip to the moon. 10:13 Hmm, $100M to go to the moon? Hell, we'll buy six. 10:13 AAAA+++ EXCELLENT SPACE PROGRAM WOULD GO TO MOON WITH AGAIN 15:58 i wonder what the 5 new currency signs in unicode 4.1 are 15:59 perl operators 15:59 > no shit. 15:59 hahaha 15:59 when will $ be removed? ;) 15:59 > fscking cracksmoking perl6. 16:00 > and it's *less* cracksmoking than it was. 16:00 we're the apl of the next millenium 16:00 not your grandfather's apl 22:25 *uselessly nerdy, but I can suck the shine off a fender.* 00:23 the incas: what a bunch of wierdos 01:14 case in point: who builds a wall like this? http://pix.loath.org/pix/Places/SouthAmerica/Peru/MachuPicchu/11445.html when all you have is an airlock, everything looks like a cylon 22:18 I'd argue that badly scanned porn is a better use of disk space than HPUX 18:28 the british post office has issued a stamp comemorating their win over australia in some sports event 18:28 the stamp is also the exact amount necessary to send a letter to australia 12:51 oh good; i remembered to take the binder clip out of my hair before going to this meeting 10:52 speaking of bogs, i got really excited to discover that the scene in Trainspotting where he goes down the toilet is lifted almost entirely from Gravity's Rainbow 10:52 really! 10:52 except it's a harmonica instead of a morphine suppository 11:10 I wonder how hard it would be to write an md5 hash in sed 11:40 < robey> whenever i switch to the c++ codebase i feel like i've travelled 5 years into the past 11:41 < robey> you have to explain everything as if you're talking to a slow person 11:41 < robey> java/perl/python: "warm up the soup in a small pan on the stove" 11:42 < robey> c++: "turn the front right stove burner to 'ignite'. while there's no visible flame, wait. rotate the burner to medium-low. find a pan...." 22:28 heh, in this epside of csy:ny with the schoolgirl and the older guy who gets murdered, the bar they were hanging out in is called 'nabokov's' 22:29 heh. 22:29 IN RUSSIA, SUBTLETY OF BRICK HITS *YOU*. 10:08 > spooooooon http://pandatoast.org/projects/blacksmithing/ 10:09 fuz is trying to throw future archaeologists off the scent 11:46 I suddenly have the urge to hit nadja and ride a purple motorcycle around 11:46 although that actual scenario would more likely consist of hitting nadja then wondering what day it is and why I can't feel my legs 12:01 bah nobody ever gets hurt motorcycling 12:01 safer than breathing! 12:02 Just like falling off a log into 85mph traffic 17:26 yeah i forgot to mention the final hide-a-key lock thinger we use so that a half dozen folks can have the same cabinet key without paying $25 each 17:27 i mean it's all at the "so many keycodes" level of complexity that i just have them all printed on a label on one of the (two) mag cards 17:27 if i ran a datacenter i wouldn't let anybody in. and i'd have an inert atmosphere 17:27 hahaha 17:27 just fill it with halon, ALL THE TIME 17:27 exactly 11:27 what's arbitrary about having some things around for aesthetics and some around for calories? 09:08 eh, i'm done talking 15:06 hahah yes! sg:a ROCKS! 15:06 screen snapshot that has 15:06 do case $i in 15:06 list) cat "$foo";; 15:07 do the wraith know about nmap? 15:07 edit) ${EDITOR-v} "$foo";; 15:07 .. 15:07 err "vi" 15:07 vi rocks!! 23:25 "I'm not gay, I just like guys sucking my cock." 23:26 > mm hmm. 23:27 > I still wouldn't mind a little thing with some guy who wasn't a dumbass that I thought I could trust. 23:27 > unfortunately the intersection of [not a dumbass, trustworthy, mutual attraction] doesn't seem to happen. 23:27 > though admittedly I have issues. 23:27 define "little thing" 23:28 a thorough rogering with a little bit of the reacharound? 23:28 > um...a nice conversation and some raging hot--what weez said. 23:28 AW YEAH, I'M HOME BABY 11:47 my sister and her husband are former cia cops. they can kill vegans with a single blow 11:47 <_> its the lack of bacon in our diet which makes us vulnerable 20:17 warm butt cracks are in for 2006 09:46 little known fact.: I was 20 before I realized On Walden Pond and The Waltons were not the same thing 16:22 Greetings from solipsism. Wish you were. 18:06 haha, marriage makes you fart! 18:07 there's something you don't learn in school 18:07 um, no xmas makes you fart 18:07 yeah 18:07 we went to tahoe for xmas 18:07 christmas trees make excellent biodegradable buttplugs. 11:35 why did i start my day off with a day old ham and cheese croissant from Specialties? i meant to get coffee. really i did. 11:41 think of ham as solid meaty coffee. 13:40 goatse's almost like an old friend at this point 13:40 almost. 13:40 yeah, if your friends are assholes 11:03 Aida was the Battlefield Earth of broadway shows. I stayed for the second act because I thought it couldn't get any worse, and wanted my money back when it was over. 11:03 and I got in for free. 15:22 the cat is being disturbingly bipedal today burning substations is manifestly the desire of the free market. hooray for utility deregulation the government would never be able to set fires with such brutal efficiency 11:32 Re: Backscroll, I once played both System Shock 2 and Aliens vs. Predator while coming up on acid. Not recommended. 15:30 i hate postgresql in the same way that i resent being married, which is sometimes a lot, and sometimes not at all, but never enough to make we want my old girlfriends back. and in this scenario, mysql is the jilted ex gf 13:28 where's ms. faelor disappeared off to, anyhoo? 13:29 mmp fwop fwop fwop 13:30 > moof: stanford has them on vacation, so she's been romping about. 13:31 *imagines a 50' tall faelor waving her arms about and stomping on a cardboard stanford campus* 13:31 GO GO MOOFZILLA 13:31 > FAELOR SMASH 11:01 what's the success rate of just taking a failed disk out of a raid and slapping it back in 11:01 pretty good ime 11:01 yeah but your shit is ghetto 15:27 i just used a sata controller to scrape the thermal pad off a heatsink 15:28 i had to read that three times 13:36 i hate microsoft 13:38 i hate microso^U*eyes twitch* I LOVE MICROS~1 22:32 > soon I should direct some energy toward making the house look less like a construction zone. 22:32 where "danger" is constrained by the fact that only you are in your room 22:32 *grin* 22:32 you have orange cones? 22:33 > yes! and orange construction fencing. 22:33 > and a backhoe. 22:33 > it was on sale and I've always wanted one. 22:33 yay ;) 22:33 tomorrow i'm gonna go cut some fiber with the backhoe 22:33 *** dr.jd has been disconnected 22:25 if only i could sell a copy of Oracle to every chinaman 13:37 so we've got the paranoids (security) saying mail should have default deny and only allow a minimum subset of html tags, and marketing saying we should allow absolutely anything this vendor feels like stuffing into the mail, and me in the middle. 13:37 whee! I need to get these people in a room together and then call in sick. 10:10 You know, it's going to take me a long long time before I stop laughing about having holy fire as an innate spell. djpie [to Gilmore]: how can you tell when a drummer is at the door? Gilmore [to djpie]: ... djpie [to Gilmore]: the knocking keeps speeding up 10:10 i guess you don't try to use glibc on not x86 10:10 using not-x86 is a waste of time and money 20:10 according to brak apache 2.2 is actually cool, but i forget why 20:11 Wossat? 20:11 which, brak? he's our coworker. 20:12 he was on icb until some crackheads ripped a piece of cat5 off of one of our public-access APs, used it to rappel through a skylight, and stole his computer 20:12 hahaha 20:12 yay 6th/misson!!@ 20:13 climbing down cat5 is bold. but then, i guess SMOKING CRACK makes you bold 20:13 hehe 20:14 > *blink* you're serious? 20:14 yes, it's true Gilmore hugs you. Gilmore [to Fuzzy]: i am giving you this hug because even though i'd love to blind you with a spade, i love you ... Fuzzy still wondering why gilmore wants to blind him with a spade Gilmore [to Fuzzy]: it was an example!! Gilmore hugs you. Gilmore [to Fuzzy]: i love you like the brother i never had Gilmore [to Fuzzy]: i mean, not like my real brother, who i actually do have, but the other one Nim [to Gilmore]: you're not supposed to talk about that one Fuzzy [to Gilmore]: and not like the one you smothered when you were six? You smile at Gilmore. Gilmore says, "fuzz knows too much." Gilmore eyes you. Nim [to Fuzzy]: here's $40 never to speak of that again Gilmore waves his credit chip over Fuzzy's wrist. Your credit implant beeps for a deposit of $40 from Gilmore. u Fuzzy satisfactorily paid off Gilmore asks, "i can't dual-wield chainsaws?!?!?" Gilmore says, "this game fucking SUCKS" 17:57 < robey> um, linux a46 is blowing solaris a45 out of the water 17:57 < robey> i think the solaris box must not be configured well...? 17:58 < robey> i'm getting that linux is THREE TIMES faster at spawning and joining 5000 threads 17:58 < robey> and twice as fast at creating 256MB logfiles 17:59 < robey> oh... bahaha! 18:00 < robey> ifeq ($(USER),robey) 18:00 < robey> CFLAGS += -O2 18:00 < robey> right. 18:22 < robey> no diff 13:40 btw i saw syriana with a date last night at the parkway 13:40 not only did a fight almost break out in the row behind us 13:40 but my date asked me what the Koran was 10:18 I have all the egregients for making coffee at home, except I'm lacking any kind of milky substance and I think I want some today 10:18 (shut UP) poot1 [to Gilmore]: how many hours would you need to cook a 17lb baby? Monkey says, "hours? try minutes when you use a deep fryer" poot1 says, "todducken. a chicken inside a duck inside a toddler" 10:13 i've been neti-ing every morning 10:14 only been sick for one day 10:14 maybe if you hadn't been neti-ing, you still would have only been sick for one day, but wouldn't have been pouring water up your nose with a teapot either :) Gilmore says, "bzzzzt" Gilmore says, "illegal use of pachelbel canon in d progression" Gilmore says, "10 yard penalty" 23:38 i belive it is fuck. nothing in the standard C library looks remotely useful. 15:52 > bwahahaha madonna is playing coachella 15:53 wow. if the expression itself hadn't already fulfilled its own destiny, i'd say that was a clear sign that coachella has jumped the shark poot1 says, "a woman's place used to be in the kitchen, but now with microwave ovens their time is better spent power-leveling your characters on WOW when you're at work" 14:27 i wonder when the rest of the world will realize that Linux self-optimizes for a single task: developing, building, and distributing itself 14:27 heheh jwb 14:27 it's so true 14:29 just look at yesterday's topic. "make -j8192 doesn't work on niagara" poot1 says, "i would like to go to mars and fight giants with six arms" Necanthrope says, "that can be arranged" Necanthrope fires up catapult poot1 asks, "what kinda word has 'pult' in it?" Necanthrope says, "any word synonymous with 'awesome'" Necanthrope references 'yardapult' 10:44 > how grateful am I to be living at a time of history when a google news search for the president's name and "shoplifting" yields so many relevant articles. 14:47 i have a hard drive here on my desk which was bought at fry's. 14:47 it came in a box labeled "400g Hitachi PATA disk" 14:48 9G IBM SCSI? 14:48 inside was a pale, flaccid wang 14:48 it is a 1.6g Western Digital from about 1996, with a photocopy of a label from a hitachi 400 glued onto it. 11:35 we're printing infant shirts that say "Don't Shake Me!" for the san mateo county department of health. which I find a little disturbing. djpie says, "oh man was i a mess all night" djpie says, "my main mistake was no dinner" dr.jd [to djpie]: what happened? dr.jd says, "oh" Fuzzy exclaims, "doh!" djpie says, "and then 8 shots of jaeger. " Fuzzy [to djpie]: hahhahaa poot1 says, "and you held it down? you are made of stern stuff, miss pie" dr.jd [to djpie]: what are you, new? 22:20 I wish I could jizz pennies. 15:07 and a gayatri hand soap 15:07 haha 15:07 all the hindu gods have soaps Obvious | http://web1.hannity.com/hannidate/index.php?page=index Solaris [to Obvious]: http://tinyurl.com/o5jvl Obvious says, "poot points this out. puke." poot1 [to Obvious]: where else are you gonna meet chicks who want to be treated like 2nd class citizens and can be told in any arguement that it's their duty to do what you tell them. poot1 gonna marry him a republican girl 10:39 Your nutsac, despite popular belief, is not a sacrament. 13:55 of course, I spill the one piece of lunch that can change the color of my shirt. 13:55 haha 13:56 > that's what you get for having a bleach cocktail in the middle of the day. 11:13 i keep having to move windows around so i can see them around the cat 16:04 guns don't kill people; kinetic energy kills people. 21:32 Trust me 21:32 Love is the dovetailing of mental illness. 22:38 yay 22:38 hahaha werner heisenberg's epitaph: "Er liegt irgendwo hier" 22:38 ie, "He lies somewhere around here" 13:34 grr overhearing hw people and mis people talk about how to spec out hardware for use with $200k+ software packages 13:35 lots of handwaving about "needs" without data to prove it. *ignores* 13:35 heheheh 13:36 > clearly gps hasn't learned that data slows down the decision-making process. 13:36 just repeat the mantra "unencumbered by the thought process" 13:37 > oooh, that's good, I'll have to remember that. 13:37 I got it from car talk :-) 16:09 oh, vasectomy 20:52 he is a very nice boy who believes with all his soul that he is going to change the world by forming a circle and singing kumbaya 20:52 replace kumbaya with "californian progressive politics" 15:21 i find the fixed-length bit to be something of a copout 18:45 pulled pork always sounds like an injury to me 18:45 well it certainly is for the pig 09:03 so why is snmp so slow? does it just send packets in groups of one and wait out the RTT for every node? 09:04 i'm sure there's stupidity like every request and response having to be separate packets 09:04 it's like 1982 technology i guess 09:04 1892 09:04 "this is great! it communicates over the NETWORK" 09:04 one if by land, two if by sea 09:04 haha 09:05 504.3.66.2.1.33.5.1.0.0.0.1.33.2.1.3: 2 09:05 > haha 09:05 hahaha 09:05 redCoatTransportConveyance ::= { aqueous } 09:05 haha 10:44 arg. anyone wanna try and help me figure out why my laptop won't connect wirelessly? i think it's a windows firewall thing, maybe, dunno, earggghhrrha 10:44 (that last sound was a dinosaur) 12:23 like the mythical troll of legend, i only come out to eat billy goats and people who won't pay my toll. 12:23 the rest happens by email. 13:20 brak: i am at snot n gobble at haight & fillmore 13:20 some building across the street is on fire, but whatever 14:48 dirty dancing/roadhouse double feature Gilmore [to djpie]: i wish the gencon.com banner graphics would stop reminding me that i'm fat and lame djpie giggles. Gilmore [to djpie]: they should have taken pictures of the four attendees who are in good shape and somewhat attractive 14:37 ** no, i wouldn't recommend making plans that involve her showing up at a place and time when she has agreed to meet you. mrien [to Leon]: i am so fucking out of weed mrien [to Leon]: it could drive a man to lesser subtances Sage [to mrien]: lord no Sage [to mrien]: surely there is someone on a corner with a nickel of the bomb Sage [to mrien]: i've seen you do totally terrifying things to get weed mrien [to Sage]: once the cops remove the corpse, and (if) they leave the body, i will search for a nickel mrien [to Sage]: hey, but gimme some credit, did those people have weed, and did i get it? Sage remembers, mrien [to stranger in bad part of ny]: dude i know you have weed. now sell me some. mrien says, "by body, folks, i of course mean: clothes" Sage says, "no you were right" mrien [to Sage]: and he gave it to me for _free_! Sage asks, "and you proved your point. did i ever fail so smuggle weed on the plane for you after that?" Sage says, "he probably thought you were some crazy white kid with dad's gun" Sage grins. mrien [to Sage]: no sir you did not and i cannot ever having been more high and uncomfortable than having smoked your socal shit and then leaving with feh for the WTC, i damn near had a heart-attack from highness 14:05 argh argh argh! 14:06 i know! the day before the show, let's swap out erik's 3-channel LED units with 4-channel LED units! 14:06 that won't make a difference, will it? 14:06 heh 14:06 it's got one more, you see. 14:09 oh wait, you mean it eats another universe? will that be a problem? 15:56 I wanna go to a gun show, they have the best jerky 16:10 <@robey> NULL would at least trigger c++'s highly refined error detection system 16:10 <@robey> aka coredump poot1 says, "Some day Boston is going to pick me up in their flying guitar spaceship and we are going to a planet of lite beer and bikini models and we will seriously rock out and wear fanny packs" 14:09 i think the dollar will stop being a reserve currency right after India builds a navy bigger than ours 14:17 ooh i just shed a 13.5" beard hair 13:09 I brought in cookies today and sent out mail to tell people to come to my office 13:09 mm cookies 13:09 and so far only one person has come 13:09 don't let fuz near them 13:09 he is a cookie ogre 13:09 he only had one 13:09 ! 13:09 *checks fuz's temperature* 15:24 i don't think any of the kernel maintainers actually run linux 10:14 erdos-bacon-condensate 16:36 heh fuz, the number of holy books in our house would scare the pants off anyone who thinks there is only One Truth you wanna know what's cool? 'hostname -s' in linux shows the unqualified nodename of the host 'hostname -s' in solaris sets the hostname to '-s' running that on every single host in the organization is cool 10:41 meanwhile I will be a teenage girl and play ddr 11:36 there's also this annoying trend of people attributing completely fabricated "quotes" to prominent revolutionary americans 11:36 > Ben Franklin once said that brown people hate freedom. 11:37 "I hate Democrats and want to kill them all for Jesus" -- Thomas Paine 12:15 aww you know I'm a gentleman to the bitches 10:37 narnia is this century's beastmaster 3. 10:37 no, that was the D&D movie 10:38 we'll see. 10:38 in three years, turn on USA at midnight and we'll see which one is in heavy rotation. 11:36 ruby is gratuitous and stupid and has an indetectably small standard library 11:36 so was perl, jwb 11:36 right, and when Perl was invented all we had was sed, awk, and tcl 11:36 but when ruby was invented we already had perl :) 11:37 heh. 11:37 "almost half as good as perl was in 1994" is not a business plan 09:26 Hey, look 09:26 a bunch of hosts are now named '-f' 09:40 > you're kidding. 09:40 haha 09:47 I imagine that in some other chat some sysadmin who hasn't yet admitted his mistake is saying to his friends "You know what's cool? On linux 'hostname -f' displays the fully qualified hostname....." 12:04 ok. I've had it. I'm going to find the guy who invented the polyphonic music ringtone and beat him or her to death with a pillowcase full of D cell batteries 12:05 > who's getting married? 12:06 NOT ME 12:06 :D 12:07 > but rachel, how will you get by without a man to take care of you?! 12:07 oh, i will just chain one to the radiator or something for emergencies. I just thought "thermoptic thong" and started giggling. 18:01 any c program longer than 100 lines contains something gross -----------------------------------mrien----------------------------------- The 231-page document prepared by independent investigators found that gravity switches on the Genesis probe designed to trigger the deployment of its parachutes were installed backward. ---------------------------------finished---------------------------------- mrien says, "we got out to the comet, got the dust, and then fucked it up at the last possible opportunity" mrien says, "its like if snake plisken had gotten the president out of new york, and then backed over him while leaving" 16:22 of course a nice fat rubber washer over your knob works wonders for pennies 16:39 > aieee 16:39 > women! can't live with 'em. 16:39 > pass the beer nuts. 16:39 *belch* 16:40 *ballscratch* [chatnet] krishna asks, "you can't spawn grenade launcher anymore?" [prognet] Eclipse says, "hahahaha" [prognet] djpie says, "*cough*" krishna heads south. Eclipse cackles. Gilmore's stomach growls. [chatnet] Gilmore says, "i just deprogged you, you dumb asshole" [prognet] Fuzzy says, "*snerk*" [chatnet] krishna says, "oh" You laugh. [chatnet] Necanthrope says, "we were having issues with people doing shit they shouldnt" [prognet] djpie says, "genius" Eclipse snorts. Nim says, "the king of breaking-it-to-you-gently" [chatnet] krishna says, "oh didn't know that" Gilmore <- diplomat [chatnet] krishna says, "sorry" Nim giggles. [chatnet] Gilmore says, "like, say, spawning grenade launchers" 17:05 wah! i just saw a guy i used to pee on! 14:46 note : avoid the tom of finland toothpaste. 13:53 so, the only problem with reading specs while getting a pedicure is that the sneaky vietnamese ladies will conspire and paint little flowers on your toenails while you're not paying attention 14:19 the best place i've ever had sex was the observing platform at the 4 meter telescope at kitt peak 14:19 nice, um, telescope 14:19 i had sex at the Michigan Dartmouth MIT (MDM) observatory too, but not on the observing platform 14:19 *adds 'has had sex in several world class observatories' to her resume dr.jd says, "if thinking of it were sufficient proof, jesus would be fisting nim right now" dr.jd says, "just sayin'" Nim says, "Just let that christ kid try to get near me. I've got a crossbow." Gilmore says, "the jews had their shot at jesus" Gilmore says, "now it's time for gentiles to finish the job" Nim nods. Nim says, "No more mister nice wasp." dr.jd says, "my big-nosed distant relatives will lend you the money to start an army of evil" 09:51 ack! I knew this little plastic minibar bottle of johnnie walker red would be different from a good single malt, but this is more different than I expected 09:51 no wonder I thought I didn't like scotch 09:51 *waters* * jenny dealing with a project mgr who just told me not to work on billing cause it has no budget 10:31 i guess i meant on a motorcycle 10:32 if it wasn't for those stupid deer... 10:32 yeah the deer are a bit of a surprise sometimes! 10:33 i was on 101S on my way back from up north at like 6 am once and there was an entire herd of them milling about in the middle of the freeway 10:33 once, on hwy 1, i saw a pickup stop to keep from hitting a deer, then the deer turned and rammed the truck. for awesome. 10:33 hahahhaa 10:33 yeah? well FUCK YOU 01:00 Dr Cuddy's rack on House needs to win an Emmy Award for Best (Still) Picture 10:48 the mac mini would be sweet 10:48 they are going to get an Ubuntu box... scerw'em 10:48 screw 'em 10:48 hehe 10:48 oOOoooBOOONtooo 10:48 it's an ancient african word meaning "cram it, whiners" (16:07:59) Robey: it's kinda cheesy but garageband works pretty well for me for doing electronic stuff (16:08:18) Chris: yeah, playing with that first before I move on to anything else. (16:08:20) Robey: it feels like writing a novel using notepad.exe (16:08:28) Chris: haha (16:08:28) Robey: and yet, it's strangely sufficient 16:25 rm_the_fucking_file_from_the_motherfucking_plane() 09:53 "Isn't Satanism basically Objectivism plus spooky robes and goats?" Spunky says, "would definitely be easier for a female to rape a motor vehicle" poot1 says, "dot com" poot1 says, "I mean hi" 18:53 I know that feeling, odo; if the menfolk floated my boat, I'd be knee-deep in dickin'. Gilmore says, "in ABC after school specials, if someone gets leukemia, he's always a really nice guy" Gilmore says, "nobody tells you how to deal with a guy who has a horrible disease and is ALSO a prick" Obvious says, "toby keith was on CMT recently doing his "we'll put a boot in yer ass, it's the american way!" song" Gilmore [to Obvious]: awesome Obvious says, "people were yelling the lyrics and waving tiny flags" Gilmore [to Obvious]: i bet at the end, he bit the head off a live iraqi 12:54 s/republicans/anyone who falls for that old crap about how unless you stomp out any hint of homosexuality, everyone will HAVE TO become homosexual and then humanity will die out/ 12:55 seriously, there're "articles" about that 12:55 my crazy uncle sent me one before I stopped communicating with him 12:55 heh, I had a "Futures" class in high school where we were taught about fusing eggs and how men are obsolete 12:55 just the other i saw some homos embracing and passed out. when i woke up i was laying in the gutter wearing leather and chains 22:39 there is something distinctly wrong-feeling about syntax highlighting for fortran source 16:17 mmm, the hitler eatery. "We use jewish slave labor in our kitchens and pass the halocost on to you!" 11:37 eh, airwolf, firefly, whatever. 13:40 we have no reason for being here. don't let your genes tell you what to do. 22:39 I'm easier than that. I'll take it for a milkshake. 22:07 so, best story about my parents ever, by someone who knew me when I was in the womb 22:07 apparently when i was wee, three couples including my parents had just settled down after some kid birthday thing and were watching... deep throat 22:08 and at a certain point, bob (telling this story) hears this big tHWACK and my mom saying to my dad, "YOU TOLD ME THEY WERE ALL THE SAME SIZE!!!" 17:15 my mom sends me random newspaper clippings at regular intervals 17:15 as her mother did to her 17:16 but since this is the 21st century my mom also sends printouts of web pages 10:30 every time you use bittorrent, bram walks around with no shirt playing with a whip. 10:30 i hope that makes you happy. 14:28 I should be less intimidated when Rob Pike does my code reviews 08:24 We had sushi. The fish market was intense. 08:24 You order your sushi from the tanks of live fish 08:25 you pick them and they throw the fish on the ground and bang it in the head with a baseball bat. 15:16 there must be something good about your job you're not telling us, kbk 17:13 snmp + windows = two great tastes that make me want to go suck on a urinal. 10:48 280, to a motorcyclist, looks like the runway 22R at Edwards AFB 15:42 I have moth balls 15:42 are you sure it's not just cold? 15:43 that must tickle 11:24 and how many of those are old accounts that haven't been used in 6 years? 11:24 how many accounts were there, really, six years ago? I'd say take that number, with a margin of error of 50% 11:27 > *blink* 11:27 > you are so not doing my taxes. 11:27 hahaha 16:38 Batelle is claiming today that we eliminated a 3.0 GPA requirement for Sales 16:39 you can now have above a 3.0 to work in sales, manoj? 16:45 i wish my foot didn't smell like gasoline. 16:08 so one time i'm in new orleans 16:09 my friend is trying to impress his girlfriend with how geeky he is 16:09 i dunno. 16:09 so he tries to tell that joke 16:09 yeah msk? 16:09 but he asks it wrong 16:09 ...how? 16:09 he says "let me show you why programmers can't keep halloween and christmas st raight. murray what's OCT 31?" 16:10 i said "HEX 19" and he got all mad 16:10 SHUT UP, THAT'S WHY???? 16:10 HAHA 16:10 for out geeking him 00:06 My sister married a German. He complained he couldn't get a good bagel back home. I said: 'Well, whose fault is that?' - Emo Philips 00:06 -- http://swtch.com/usr/local/plan9/lib/fortunes 11:30 CS is nicely scalable .. if you deploy it, and it proves insufficient, you can light it on fire 11:30 haha 22:16 oh my. Scorpion King is on 22:16 will you stand alone before the fury of his armies? 22:16 such a fun movie 22:17 > I watched that earlier. * msk puts it on 22:18 will you stand alone before the army of his furries? 22:29 if the rain was a geiger counter, i'd be dead by now 11:13 cogent fucked? 11:13 routing between 450 and 200 paul is going through texas 17:25 walking by the metreon was kind of depressing. 17:25 > why? 17:25 ps3 campout. 17:26 it's like the internet puked all over 4th street. 19:29 i'm NOT like the other kids! 19:29 i only have half a brain! 19:29 (i was just learning how to use my new sharp stick) 19:30 eric the half a bee 19:30 Read the manual 19:32 it said "for indoor or outdoor use only" and I got confused 17:34 I watched a dude style his hair in the subway station for about ten minutes the other day while I waited for sooky to finish work and when he was done he put his hat on. 15:45 I have a mysql cluster 15:45 fear me 15:45 if you use the ointment, it should clear up in no time. 21:56 australia just called and it is apparently STONED <@mirth> i'll wait for the iPhone shuffle (only $99, but it chooses what number you dial) 11:49 man, i am seriously going to hurt myself or someone in this humanities class 11:50 who the hell reads "on the road" and takes away the message that it is a condemnation of anti-capitalistic behavior because kerouak pays for a bus ride at the end 16:36 people who don't like MLK just suffer from blacktose intolerance 21:22 god, now all i can think about is chocolate dipped cocks marching up a mountain made of meat. 21:22 lovely argentinian men carrying around swords of meat 21:22 THANKS, GUYS. 21:22 heh savia 21:22 I'll take that image, frankly 21:22 hmm I really have to get to watching the rest of Rome season 1 21:22 savia, now imagine it with the cartoon music in the background -- "Teddy 21:22 savia, now imagine it with the cartoon music in the background -- "Teddy Bear Picnic." 21:23 That's ART, bitches. 16:38 according to many, many games of civilization, the keys to massive growth in a population center are 2 good military units stationed in the city, an aqueduct, a hospital, a grocery store, and an airport. 14:21 TAQUITO AND TWO-BUCK CHUCK: The Quickening 10:57 we can't even colonize canada yet, much less the moon or mars 20:12 Go check my wastebasket and see the sad, blue plastic corpse of a vibrator that bravely gave its life so that I might jack off at will. 01:10 talking to my friend Barbara tonight, she joined a D&D first ed. group. They get together once a month in the DM's mom's basement and they're only allowed to spin 70' s vinyl while playing. 01:10 apparently the first thing they encountered upon entering their first dungeon was a group of bandits. 01:11 Barbara immediately engaged the bandits in conversation. 01:11 to which one of the longtime group members said, "I TOLD you this would happen if we let a girl in." 01:11 she's not allowed to talk to the MOBs anymore. 16:46 my boss is playing the mario theme on the guitar 16:46 shout TURTLE and club him with a mallet 16:46 and act disappointed when he doesn't turn into four gold coins 10:55 "Curing Gout and Chronic Pain at Yahoo! (aka Unicode at Yahoo!)" 10:55 hehehe 10:56 municode 10:56 eek 10:56 municode wants you []! 10:56 every symbol is a picture of a bus running a red light coming right for you 09:23 you goths have no kultcha. 09:23 that was totally Generic Jerry Springer Guest Sonata in Loser Minor 09:24 c'mon, you canadian ponce, 'colors'. 09:24 ever hear of it? 09:24 what ever, flavour flave. 09:24 who the fuck let the lighting guy in here? 09:29 form of: drippy schlong! 13:28 this has to be the single most correct onion article of all time 13:28 http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28784 13:28 tied with the 5-bladed razor article "It does tell us something about antiderivatives, but not something nice." -- Skidmore prof Mark Hofmann, exploring integral calculus in 1998. 17:12 > it turns out a distributed-but-consistent database is every bit as Rube Goldberg as I thought it would be. 17:12 mmm, rube goldberg. 17:12 I am looking forward to when the ball makes the foot kick the mousetrap over the select statement. 17:32 I wish I were queer so I could get chicks 10:05 > gps: my team names our releases after drinks, and we were all set for the Kamikaze release, but in a unique move, it was squashed from above because of our japanese business relationships. it's been interesting to explain to the team why I agree with that decision. 10:05 hehe yes smart 10:06 instead, we called it "Yellow Peril" 16:08 <@alison> i think i'll pretend that my peeps are just really weirdly shaped hamentaschen. 21:30 emmie, please ask your relatives to stop spamming me. 21:30 sonya katz and jerome katz both want me to enlarge my penis. :( 21:30 it's what we do. 14:27 I wouldn't buy girlscout cookies from any moppet that didn't have visible track marks oozing chocolate and mint 11:30 what a fucking joke 11:30 so, new AC in the server room here is causing a pressure vacuum 11:31 so, to "solve" the problem? IT removed the window in the door. 11:34 vacuum problem solved. 11:34 secure room? no longer secured. 11:34 cold air? escaping. 10:01 which reminds me, have you seen how expensive butter is lately? geez 10:01 it's over $3.25 per gallon 15:07 <@robey> i've learned not to talk about perl... it's like ragging on the irish in an irish bar... you WILL find yourself upside down in the dumpster 17:58 I could buy into religion if there was a list available for public viewing where God recorded someone's heaven/hell status 13:43 too many guitar lessons lead to jazz fusion 11:16 the Tomcat FAQ informs me that "Bad design will hurt perforamnce" 15:54 second note to self: stop picking $orifice 09:04 i am a pretty frequent abuser of comcast install/cancel. if there's nothing on i cancel, and if there's something i want to watch i order it. luckily there's no contract period 09:04 haha really? i expected them to keep you on the phone for 20 minutes trying to offer you 10% discounts and 6 free months of playboy 09:04 gps: they don't have a witty retort for "Battlestar Galactica is not on" 17:16 I have never had any name or nickname that I liked. 17:18 > you should find one! 17:19 I lie about my name whenever they ask for it at starbucks. 17:19 a couple weeks ago all of afternoon coffee cracked up because my cup said octavian. 15:50 Redneck Zombies, total Troma crap. I, Zombie however is a very good movie and the masturbation scene works in the context it's used. 09:17 > hmmm there's a 9:55 train I could catch 09:17 to where?! 09:17 > work. 09:18 wtf it's saturday hello 09:18 > tris: it's not, actually. 09:18 haha 09:18 Fri Mar 30 09:18:26 PDT 2007 09:18 it's not? 09:18 > nope. 09:18 oh yes. friday. 09:18 i knew that.... [excluding tris] > holy shit, he is the best chat drunk I have ever encountered. 09:19 you'll be prepared when saturday finally arrives 09:19 hopefully *** info Exclude: dr.jd's next message excludes tris: 09:19 it's true 21:54 stty -ixon made my nuts hurt 08:59 this is nice. i'm waking up a little later every day. soon i will be back to sleeping until noon and living on chocolate cereal. 10:49 listen 10:49 i will now tell you what is awesome: cajun catfish courtbouillon is awesome. 10:49 but not as awesome as the love of god. 10:50 the love of god won't get you laid like this recipe will 13:48 i wish intel's developers weren't tragically ADHD. they have 90% of 100 different features in their driver 13:49 mostly due to keith "i redesigned X11 again and checked it in last night" Packard 13:50 it's a disease that plagues many projects: instead of fixing the last 10% of functionality, rewrite it from scratch, implementing a different 90% 10:29 I just et some breakfast from the breakfast bar at the grocery store by my house, and I am filled with biscuits and regret. 10:29 I really cook better than a lot of places do. 08:46 now i'm picturing avril lavigne sqautting and pissing in the middle of a song screaming I TOLD U I WAZ HARDCORE!!!1one Obvious exclaims, "overheard someone saying this in a very authoritative "i am smart" tone of voice today: you just KNOW theyre gonna make that poor man the escape goat!" 16:39 omg, i just realized i've gone six weeks without trying to stick fridge magnets to my leg. i know what i'm doing when i get home. 14:55 or if you have 30 sysadmins to throw at the task, then about two hours of brain-numbing labor 14:55 if you throw 30 sysadmins at brain-numbing labor, half of them will quit and the other half will go out with them for beers to say goodbye 11:18 i love reading Vol 1 Issue 1 of some 'zine, because you know the odds are really low of there ever being a #2 18:22 and then have a struct aes_block { unsigned long[AES_BLOCK_SIZE/sizeof(unsigned long)] }; ... the rest is obvious 09:00 I figure if everyone's an adult and consenting, kink on, you glorious freak bastards. 05:47 oy 05:47 best party in a long time 05:47 also: new substance! 13:50 bahaha 13:50 i have successfully tasked the intern to go sit at the las vegas airport all day and count ppl getting out of airplanes 09:32 Annie's Paramount. 09:32 Where middle-aged homosexual couples go to dine. 09:33 I don't mind the middle-aged so much. as long as they don't act like it in public 11:11 <@mtam> anybody not seen the opera singing mobile phone salesman yet? 11:11 <@alison> i posted it to my blog and my opera-singing friend was LAME about it. 11:11 <@alison> apparently most opera singers are snobs. :P 15:51 > immediate primary effect of vacation: I don't want to work on this project any more. 15:52 heh fuz 15:52 hehe yay fuz 15:52 a new project awaits you in the offdanger colonies poot1 says, "If I ever build a cyborg army, they are totally going to play juno reactor as they march around" 07:54 > speaking of russians, I think I would spend a week dying of laughter if JD came home engaged to some Russian chick. 07:54 ahahaha 07:54 > I'd be happy for him, of course. but only for a week, 'cause then I'd be dead. 07:55 OH HAI I MARRIED AN AXE MURDERER 10:48 it'd be really awesome if germany made scientologists wear little volcanos on all their clothes. 10:49 Xenu loves me / this I know / high up in his vol-ca-no 16:13 hah 16:13 someone tried to get my goat by referring to canada as "north montana" 14:48 wow 14:49 String.equals is only half as expensive as the virtual invocation that dispatches it 14:49 for every clock tick spent inside the method two ticks were spent entering it 09:22 Why is the morning filled with pain? 09:22 you're not even trying anymore. 09:23 It's true. 09:23 Sleep dep isn't like ennui at all 09:23 I thought I'd give it a shot for old times sake though 10:27 i like my t-shirts like i like my women. 10:28 on the verge of failure. 10:37 10:27 <@aerik> i like my t-shirts like i like my women. 10:37 10:28 <@aerik> on the verge of failure. 10:37 that made me snark coffee 10:37 which, just so you know, is a painful experience 10:38 the alternate choice was "cute in their prime, but kind of sad these days" 12:39 i bought a basket for my bike. it has all the usual instructions, don't carry over 8 pounds, etc... 12:40 and then at the end it says baguettes must not exceed 18" 12:40 shove a 35lb frozen turkey in there 12:40 hee! 12:40 everything else is played totally straight please describe web 2.0 to me in 2 sentences or less. you make all the content. they keep all the revenue. 09:33 and it was put on me by a sweet bike nerd. i thought of you, erk 09:34 valeriepie: why, was he talking about hating his jerk of a cat in loving tones during the whole session? 11:10 i'm in ur cpu stealing your tick based scheduler quanta 11:16 hey i got a coffee from chatz! 11:16 the undead coffee stand OF DOOM 10:06 dear subconscious, why did I have a dream about condoleeza rice grabbing my ass? 10:06 love, jeff. 10:07 those vice-like hands 18:34 j2me: Because hitting yourself in the cock with a hammer all day isn't painful enough. 10:33 here's a good philosophy about arguing on the internet: 10:34 "in the end, one of us was correct about the use of a common technical definition, and the other had sex with women." 11:59 11:36#Med laura such a shame, it's so hard to see the indigo girls in concert. you get groped by other women. 11:59 11:37#med lerp plus it's impossible to find your subaru in the lot. 11:59 =spittake= 19:35 Any of you feebs have moving boxes? 19:35 No no, ladies and gentleman. Hands off, he's *mine*. 17:14 sounds to me like you want to do something more straightforward, like "time = *((time_t*)((char*)buf[i])); value = *((double*)((char*)buf[i+4]));" 07:56 04:32 Q: How many Prolog programmers to change a lightbulb? 07:56 04:32 A: no. 12:51 Jenny accelerates along a curve defined by the awesome factorial. She runs on weapons-grade kickass, and can fire over 3,000 rounds per minute of depleted fantastic shells. 12:51 i'm costing the taxpayers money YooHooligan says, "When the apocalypse comes I want to be knee-deep in dick." 10:55 make is the fortran of dependency tracking 11:37 "Alberto Gonzales is the first Attorney General who thought the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth were three different things." 03:57 burning man was both crappy and omfg amazing. 09:47 ssh to a home proxy on a high port 09:47 that was total greek to me 09:47 hee 09:48 my old box worked fine, the ups box works fine, it's just the new box that doesn't connect 09:48 use a secure shell to remotely connected to a terminal running irssi at home over a transmission control protocol port which is situated at a port number higher than 1024. 09:48 CLEAR NOW? :) 09:48 our tech is going to come by today to take a look 09:49 I hate you 10:46 all the features of the real hummer are great. the sales guy is like "and here's where you hook it up to the helicopter" 11:39 <@robey> doh 11:39 <@robey> i wanted to send some beer to a friend in georgia for his birthday 11:39 <@robey> turns out the shipping alone would be $84 11:39 <@robey> the beer is good, but it's not THAT good 11:40 <@tap> freeze dry it 11:40 <@phil> folgers 40s 14:44 i was at wholefudz not 5 minutes ago 14:44 rassin frassin company lunch 14:44 they hired some girl from wisconsin who's afraid of all food to be our receptionist and order lunches *** info Topic: rachel changed the topic to "RIP robert jordan" 10:46 that sonofabitch 10:47 > hahaha 10:56 > 10:52 * robey suddenly fears for the health of george r r martin 10:56 Is that series not finished yet? 10:57 Cuz I may just go kill him to take out my frustrations 13:59 I'm not sure there is much of his other works, apart from The Hobbit, the Silmarillion, and the umpteen volumes of Christopher Tolkien's _Shit I Found In Dad's Attic, Volume _. 15:03 cats was okay, as sappy overproduced musical theatre for furries goes 14:08 aww, they gave me a vest and a coffee mug 14:08 any bids before I ebay? 14:09 heh, they're just from the y! company store 14:09 better than cafe press at least 14:10 hahah 14:10 is it because of your mother that you hate cafepress? 10:34 OMG I FUCKING HATE TEENAGERS 10:35 story time with ren! 09:36 I am having trouble taking the customer from sexsihoterotic.com seriously. 09:32 ugh. hate being in the office at this hour 09:33 Yes. 09:34 at least now I know, that feeling I have of everyone having been here for awhile, when I get in at my usual time? bunk, they get in right before me 10:33 heh nice. i have just been informed by reuters that the support group for my main product was dissolved, so i asked them about all those support bills we've been paying 10:34 hahaha 10:34 dissolved! "there was a terrible flood. they were made out of sugar. you can only imagine the carnage." 15:08 didn't he [the Punisher] first appear as a spidey villain or something? 15:08 wikipedia will know, in an article that's 4x longer than the one on Darfur 10:54 i like this take on the iphone & appletv: 10:54 "I wish this company understood the value of openness, but they don't, so I'm going to keep buying their closed, crippled shit until they get it." 14:19 Fixies are sort of the christian scientists of bike technology * goldenmean orders The Unix Security Model: A Guide To Childrearing from Amazon. 13:45 just saw this on a mailing list: 13:45 With two kids, you're still running a one-on-one defense 13:45 much of the time. It's not until you hit three kids that you switch 13:45 to zone, and it's not until four that kids change from particles into 13:45 waves. 08:37 there's one for me as the petitioner. there's another for phone as the benefic iary. mine is done. 08:38 http://arctic.org/~dean/greencard-questions.pdf 08:38 there's a set of medical forms that he got from a doctor. those are done. my t ax returns from the past three years are done. 08:38 and I have to do a big fiancial statement form that looks painful and is going to be last 08:38 wow, so much work 08:39 and I need to get a letter from my boss stating I work here and for how long a nd how much I earn 08:39 and we need to go get photos taken 08:39 yeah so much work to prove you're not gonna leech off the extensive US social welfare systems :) 10:04 haha ugh. has anyone seen this attack on shitty home dsl routers? 22:05 last time i had a windoze box, i just installed cygwin, closed my eyes, and thought of england 22:05 with cygwin, you can pretend it's a real OS 21:52 tonight, court called our house the IHOG. international house of green. 12:01 mmm, python programmer. I write a nicely written script to do some license checking, have him review it, since it's my second python script. after the review, he says "So, this is good, but you should redo it and make the checking parts into an object." 12:01 I ask what I gain from that, and he says, "Well, it'd be an object." 17:01 Apple's built in dictionary doesn't think 'refactor' is a word. 11:45 I was chatting with someone this weekend about how I've learned that overplanning software architecture may be short-sighted, because no matter how carefully you design a beautiful stallion, someone is later on going to have some business requirement that forces you to staple a squid to it 10:38 winemaking links, in case pox gets tired of beer: http://www.metafilter.com/65966/Winemaking 10:38 is it hard? 10:39 looks like it might be easier than beer 10:39 but harder (and more time-consuming) than pie 10:39 "If the Sumerians could do it, you probably can too." 17:34 I buy biblically themed porn and pretend they're speaking spanish. 07:25 I just realized there's a term for selling your soul to the devil, but you can't sell your soul to god. 07:25 god makes you work for it. 07:25 bastard. 08:40 oh good, cat is singing along with the horrible pounding 08:41 and here comes BEEPY O'DIESEL 17:02 "sticking it to the man" by withholding sub fare is like punishing your cat by not reading it a bedtime story 01:19 having a small child really slows you donw 01:22 wow this is worse than a modem 10:12 Yahoo!'s next big thing? Bo-ring, but sent globally and translated into 10 different languages. 10:12 Now I just edit articles where the main question is whether "cocksucking" should be one or two words 'cause Webster's doesn't handle that sort of thing. 10:13 A WINNAR IS ME 10:14 cocksucker is one word, so my vote would be for cocksucking to be a standalone term as well 10:15 you should hyphenate. normally I oppose, but - looks like a tiny dong fucking the words together 16:25 i don't understand cron on this machine. I'm just going to make a cron job on anoher machine ssh to this one and run jobs 16:25 i'm going home now. 10:12 heh 10:13 when i die, TMBG songs will STILL be going through my head. 03:18 haha Subject: Kernel Development & Objective-C 03:18 Why not C# instead ? 03:18 (that's the first response) 03:19 doesn't linux have an in-kernel python interpreter already? 03:19 i think you misspelled ACPI 03:20 yeah, that's why it was included - to parse the IASL stuff. 15:48 I truly, truly wish that Bjarne Stroustrup was drowned as a small child. 14:04 I mean, I had a random idea yesterday, and sent an email declaring my willingness to write a DIY article on building your own sex toys out of potatoes and not only did I get it approved, I got the fucking project subsidized. 14:04 This pleased me so much I spent the rest of yesterday shitting kittens and bouncing off the walls at work 17:32 we will hotbox the comfy room 17:32 and talk about the periodic table tramp stamp I am planning to get. 07:36 mucilpeton 07:37 The lingual sputterings of a qq brain waking 07:37 speb. 07:38 he's like m-w.com piped through a circuit-bent speak & spell. 11:42 the important thing is, YAY ABSINTHE. 'cuz anise is yummy but Jager is not. 11:42 i'm not a big fan of the anise 11:42 I used to drink arrak and it was like a good n'plenty wrapped around a brick. 14:05 dear japan: please stop exploring your musicality 11:09 oh man, I heart my boss. he found a way to translate my rants of "we need to stop marketing only to marketroids, because that makes non-marketroids think we're idiots" into "define and execute a segment-based marketing strategy" *** info Arrive: manoj (manoj@hostname.com) entered group 19:10 hellllooooo from 3rd world mountain view *** info Arrive: ren (ren@hostname.com) entered group 19:10 bah, power went out again 17:46 hey moof, where are you at the moment? 17:46 *sings "Where in the world is... moofie moofie moofo"* 17:47 tokyo; 2-7-3 ebisu-nishi 7fl shibuya-ku tokyo-to 150-0021 to be specific. 17:47 hehehe 17:47 RTFW on japanese addressing sometime if you're bored; it's quite fucked up. 17:48 why didn't they just use IPV6? 20:28 oh, I don't hate OSX .. polycarbonate cuts my flesh more often, and I love polycarbonate 14:56 NASA is sort of dead .. it's split into three parts: a living brain floating in a jar somewhere out in VC land, a mindless undead zombie stalking the halls of Archive HQ, and a disembodied spirit which bk keeps staked to the underside of 14:56 his car. 10:33 THIS IS GIMPTOWN 10:35 OUR CRUTCHES WILL BLOCK OUT THE SUN 10:36 we just saw the new american apparel catalog. jesus christ. 10:37 now they have dog t-shirts and even the dog model looks like it's being beaten between takes 15:15 i have this secret fantasy that the sherpas have been climbing everest for centuries and just keeping it a secret 15:16 that's kind of a boring secret fantasy 15:16 my secret fantasy involves tortilla chips, one ton of feathers, two carrot cakes, and several 80's sitcom stars 15:17 hahaha 15:17 > give it up, twid, Kirk Cameron's a fundie. 15:17 HE'S JUST LIKE TOM CRUISE, JUST FOR APPEARANCES 14:06 this product is obviously better than the other one, because this manufacturer has a picture of an F-22 Raptor in their sales lit 10:11 10:06 'Jan. 15, 2001: The "free encyclopedia that anyone can edit" is invented by Thomas Edison and Malcolm Jamal-Warner. Happy 15th Birthday, 10:11 + Wikipedia' sounds like someone on the block is having a sleepover. if only I could turn benadryl into a weaponized aerosol. 15:40 > I feel like my career is a video game. last job: keep multiple DBs in sync, using managed transactions on writes. new job: keep multiple DBs in sync, without managed transactions, and oh yeah, every DB operation after the first has to be asynchronous. 15:40 > my next job is going to be synchronizing DBs that are connected by tin cans and string. 15:40 > the endboss is gonna suuuuuuuck. 10:00 so i think it's funny that Joyent, long-time obnoxious solaris/zfs cheerleaders, have been offline for three days because ZFS ate their shit. 10:01 "The ZFS corruption got onto/into the backups." 10:01 this is why a snapshot is not a backup 09:48 oh for fuck's sake. "Gene variants, prostrate cancer linked" 09:48 you don't say 09:48 aren't newspaper editors supposed to be at least marginally literate? 09:48 "help. my cancer is lying on it's stomach" 09:49 prone cancer still a mystery 09:49 nevermind supine 10:32 *snerk* http://redirx.com/?0b00 10:33 hehe 10:33 by the author of "Teach Yourself Routing in 24 Hours" 10:34 subtitle: if it takes that long, you're probably already fired 16:15 wow, there's some really nice hitler action figures out there 16:38 Also, as I got on the J to go home, a woman reading Atlas Shrugged got up to give me her seat 16:38 I am sad there is no still graphic I could submit to doingitwrong.com for this action 19:14 As astronauts prepare to open the International Space Station's (ISS) new Japanese room Friday, mission controllers continue to tackle a power supply glitch afflicting a giant robot outside the orbiting laboratory 19:15 they add a japanese room and giant robots show up 19:15 typical. 11:31 all your network are belong to skype 11:31 fuck that 11:33 it can have as much of my network as it can manage to squeeze thru my tight grip on its nuts 16:41 > *mumbles something obscure about how the ten thousand things can just go and suck it* 16:42 I don't recall that verse of the Dao de Jing, yo 16:42 perhaps it should be ... updated 16:42 "Ten Thousand Things" is a Buddhist expression representing the dynamic interconnection and simultaneous unity and diversity of everything in the universe. 16:42 thanks, intarweb! 16:42 so... karma? 16:43 clearly it needs 81 verses! 16:43 "The way that is the way is not the true way / Do not rely on Google maps alone, sailor." 14:10 14:09 <6> pef appears to be interviewing a sysadmin candidate 14:10 14:09 <6> the guy does appear to be overweight and bearded so I'm optimistic. Can't quite tell how tall he is though 14:13 > is tall better or worse? 14:16 14:12 <6> sysadmins are mostly hired on mass. The taller larger SAs are far more senior than short skinny ones 14:29 oh boy, the neighbors are putting bait in the coyote feeder 14:29 i mean, their children in the baby swing *** goldenmean has changed the topic on channel #/dev/gaf to Nadja Herreshoff. Born 1978. Enter the Carousel. This is the time of renewal. *** irc.holonet.org Monday April 14 2008 -- 10: 23:22 -07:00 14:52 i don't know how to say this so i'm just gonna come out with it 14:52 i had a dream that me and aerin convinced barack obama to have a threesome 10:57 occaisionally, during the heat of the monet, eric will go, "Karen.... Karen.... Karen...." which always makes me want to yell, "WHAT?!" 09:36 what would a porn manual typewriter fetish magazine be called? QWERTY SLUTS? or something more tasteful like Underwood? 09:54 we'll be making sweet, sweet provisional two-year green card love tonight. BOW CHICKA BOW BOW 14:14 whitey will pay 14:26 whitey will just put it on the expense account. 21:15 I found Jeeves and Wooster slash... JEEVES AND WOOSTER! 08:24 we had a great conversation in the car this morning. I was teasing court and telling sophia court has a new gf. named Halflife 2. 08:25 wait, who is this? 08:25 haha 08:25 is that online? I think I've played that. 08:25 you're thinking of SECOND life 08:25 how is halflife different 08:25 more head crabs 16:08 i think we're doing it wrong. http://www.electricrain.com/~cgw/tmp/diw-scrum-burndown.png 11:07 heh, i get this comment by email from a doctor who I mailed to ask about this medical device company: 11:07 "it is published in Anesthesiology & Analgesia, which is basically the National Enquiror of medical publications" 11:07 haha 11:07 also 11:07 "the device has been put in cadavers and still shows a reading!" 11:19 weezyl's voice drips with honey while she rips out your entrails 11:21 like the fierce aztec high priest, she reaches in, grabs your still-beating heart, raises it to the sun and gives a mighty cry. 11:21 "COCKS!" i6:31 I would rather dip my scrotum in a lake of feral marmosets than read fiction set in the warhammer universe. Seriously though, asking a professional musician to play at your event for free because it's just that cool is kinda like asking a hooker to give you a freebie because you're a really good lay, no? Jonathan Ben Ari 11:00 incompetence is a double-edged banana. 11:42 but thankfully maker faire is only 2 days, and isn't quite as hipsterish as SXSW 11:42 heh 11:42 true 11:43 numa, are you serious? 11:43 if you stacked up the trucker caps it'd poke a hole in the moon's ass 07:33 WD-50 07:34 Daniel Boloud's $50 hamburger joint. :) 07:34 but if we're exchange fancy restaurant tips, i like wallse 07:35 Rice to Riches is a rice pudding place, in the middle of little italy. 07:36 i like the halal cart on 6th ave in front of the ubs building that doesn't even open until 9pm and runs a drive-thru for taxi drivers with a couple of two-way radios 08:20 my college bf had chickens growing up. grandma thought some chicks being sold at easter were sooooo cute. and the boys were sooooo much prettier than the girls. so they had a pack of roosters that they couldn't bring themselves to eliminate. 08:20 jody's dad said every time he left the house, a rooster would go for his balls. 20:14 I got the Jesus-crazy Brother Jed guy to autograph one of his pamphlets for me after skipping class for a couple of hours to heckle him 20:14 it reads, "Repent, contentious woman!" 20:14 it's so fucking awesome. 21:10 21:06 "so far the Great Depression 2008 is shaping up to be a Great Disappointment. Not so much The Grapes of Wrath as Raisins of Mild Inconvenience" personally. 09:55 It's not that I don't like her. I do. She just gets chatty as hell and it interferes with me 09:55 OH MY FUCKING GOD 09:55 WHO THE PENGUIN FUCK IS OUTSIDE BABYTALKING SOMEONE ELSE'S DOG? 09:55 SHUT UP WHORE 15:49 > "there are 90,000 fewer children in Seattle today than there were in 1960. As Seattle's population grew by 10,000 between 2000 and 2005, its population of children under 18 grew by just 200." 15:50 who's killing the children?! 15:52 m$ ground them up to make NT? 18:40 MY GRAFFLING POWERS ARE UNSTOPPABLE 18:40 omg, I think I just gained two levels 18:41 storyboards, wireframes, and flowcharts ALL IN ONE DOCUMENT 15:39 wow, coworker reports seeing a shirt for sale in the castro which says "I Shaved My Balls For *This*?" 15:40 hahaha 15:40 and he didn't wear it to work for the AOL badge photo?!? 15:40 that's why it came up :) 15:40 we want to get them for the dinner with AOL CEO tonight 11:53 i am picking out a new doctor to have as my primary care physician, and in true juvenile fashion, i am really tempted to go with "dr. samuel dong" 11:54 *sighs at herself* 09:42 also, some sucker just handed me $500 for that empty readynas 09:42 she said she already has another one. slow learner? 09:31 we should have an old fashioned girlie sleepover and get everyone's dirt. and the boys can all gather elsewhere and try to raid and steal our panties and then we'll all take e and then it will really great 16:44 hhahahahahahahahaha aicyclist just went by in head to toe safety orange and reflective material with a video camera mounted on his helmet 16:44 of course he blew the stop sign too 16:44 man, this is terrible 08:33 there was probably some debate ages ago about whether we should type dotted-quads for ip addrs or not 08:33 and the solution was this mess 08:33 or... someone just thought it would be cool to accept these things 08:33 octal probably works too 08:34 i have a feeling this "debate" took the form of a couple of jerks at UC flaming each other 15:15 I had a fun 5 months being completely mutually destructive with a Denny's waitress. 15:16 lots of free coffee in that particular relationship though. 15:16 and by fun I mean hellish. 11:41 bad ipod shuffle transitions #3434: vaughan william's oboe concerto -> cypress hill "lick a shot" 11:42 bad ipod shuffle transitions #3435: terrence mckenna/spacetime continuum -> spice girls 18:25 ha, my son's so funny. I asked him if he was feeling the pain of having no computer at my house and he said yes. 18:25 are you learning your lesson? 18:25 which lesson? 18:25 do not lie to mom 18:26 or she will fuck my shit up 16:38 this $2 deep fried burrito is weird 10:03 jwb - the original thing can't be an array. you can't put arrays into hashes, only scalars (such as a reference to an array). You're thinking of $foo->{'foo'} = @{$foo->{'foo'}}. 10:04 lesson: people are still trying to figure out what perl5 syntax means 13 years later 10:44 TWEET MY NAME SHE SAID/WE WERE FUCKING ON THE RUG/I TWEET IN SPRING SUN 10:44 more driving later today, I'll catch some then. 10:44 this is the GOP nominee for SD senate seat 10:44 hahaha 10:44 twid++ * twid bows 10:45 "Twitter's not foreplay / Best put that iPhone down, son / Cock won't suck itself." 10:45 :) 11:01 I'm going to start telling the cold callers that john is no longer with the company and the new president/owner is Mike Hunt 11:01 no no it's fine, it's grandcentral thinger, was sending it to 'rents to try out 11:01 braaaaaaaak! *hic* braaaaaaaaaaaak! 11:01 oh, those cold-calling bastards and I are going to have a fine, fine summer together 12:48 fubar.com is really scary 12:49 if you want to get an idea of what it's like to have married 23yo girls from arkansas hit on you, I guess it's great 01:37 crazy frenchies, labeling their home appliances in a language I can't read 01:37 after three washes, I think we've finally got the combo washer/dryer convinced to run a drying cycle *** info Sign-on: sean (sean@hostname.com) entered group 09:24 .. so of course, i blame sean casey 09:24 oh, hi sean! 09:25 hi! 09:26 i am always to blame... just blame me, and i'll forgive myself 09:26 it's kinda like jesus, but more hippy 15:31 isn't joining wow now like being the dude who took the 4th hit of ecstacy right as the sun came up and the generators got spun down at a rave? 15:32 I like Emmie's analogy of it being like starting smoking in your 30s. 14:24 i wonder if it would be justifiable homicide when i inevitably kill this guy for saying "iops per second" 09:19 "You don't know me, but I know your son. You know. In *that* way." 09:20 "Just kidding! Totally haven't plowed his back 40. How's by y'all?" 09:20 I am *exactly* the kind of girl you want to take home to your folks. 12:02 new (recent phd) programmer hired here: "Uh, does main() have to be the last function in the file?" 16:45 find ~cow -type f -name fix\*.pl | wc 16:45 17 16:46 ah, to do it right the first time! 08:02 speaking of assholes: reports that UBS may be compelled to provide the names of affluent US clients who allegedly used UBS to avoid taxes 08:02 > wow, how'd that happen with Bush still in power? 08:03 please fluffly little god, let there be a McCain in there 15:30 i've said it before and i'll say it again: People who think they know everything spoil it for those of us who do. 15:34 and i just wanna say, you *know* you're with the right woman when after two nights and three days of partying, you compare notes and realize that the girl who you were making time with and got the phone number from and said "come visit some time" is the girlfriend of the guy who your wife got the digits from and said "come up and visit us some time" 11:43 there is a trancendental meditation community in the town where I went to high school 11:43 and my wife is from there 11:44 it attracts people who have a hard time paying attention to things and getting to where they need to be on time 11:45 and though vigorous meditation, they are able to pay even less attention to things, and often are rarely able to get where they are going at all 11:46 part of the meditation is yogic flying 11:47 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yogic_flying 11:48 video here: http://redirx.com/?06y5 13:41 twid's reaction to itunes influences me to find one of those pokey things from the silverware drawer that nobody knew what it was used for and press it firmly into his kneecap 09:02 seen in the linux kernel 09:02 static unsigned int ignore_ppc = -1; 09:02 haha 09:03 that by itself is just stupid, no necessarily a bug, but 09:03 if (event == CPUFREQ_START && ignore_ppc <= 0) { 09:03 is definitely a bug 15:26 well, that's what you get for not watching them on genuine american tellys but on some Aussie PAL device spliced together with kangaroo entrails. 10:10 my wife and i are in pretty much every way a team, so if i ended up a billionaire and she left me she'd still be completely entitled to half as far as i'm concerned, and i know she feels pretty much the same way 10:11 of course, if one of us left the other would probably kill them. 10:11 so there's that. 10:11 hee 10:12 > that's just sexy. 10:12 i could see it now... the last words i would ever hear my wife saying... as she's standing over me... 10:12 "how the hell do you reload this thing?" 11:34 you know what is awesome? signing pto form for minion who is going to renew her marriage vows....on the bridge of the enterprise in the las vegas star trek hilton before they close down 'star trek: the experience' 11:34 <3 11:34 she invited me, but i cannot go 15:38 This is the only way to teach math: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Principia_Mathematica_theorem_54-43.png 10:01 jwb makes me giggle 10:01 PALINDROME TIME 10:02 a man, a plan, a homo: omohanalpamana 10:02 =snort= 09:50 while you bitches are playing travian, jwb is living the dream. soon he will be attacking the other walnut farmers 09:52 a live action travian would be awesome 09:53 I smell a burning man camp 09:53 it's called earth 09:53 isn't that what SCA is? 09:53 *snort* 13:55 I get paid to come up with synonyms for "jizz" 13:55 correction: I get paid poorly to come up with synonyms for "jizz" 13:55 and yet it is like the mothership done called me home 17:37 True story: The doorbell rings and 2 little Asian women tell Bahman they're looking for someone who speaks Indonesian. So I go to the door. They're JWs, they found his name and thought he was Indonesian. I am now the proud owner of an Indonesian version of Watchtower. 11:43 the girl on this soccer team is named Sheridan Blitz. I hope she's pretty. 11:52 > even a stopped clock is right twice a day. 11:52 Unless it's a 24 hour military clock 11:52 unless it's a 24-hour clock 12:38 yeah. well, here's the story of computer software, in a nutshell: 12:38 someone decides that for some new project, all the existing tools out there are too big and too complex 12:38 they write a smaller, leaner version free of all the cruft that, for some reason, they think served no truly important purpose 12:39 project is a great success, but accretes features and cruft to deal with pathological cases, some a matter of social engineering rather than aesthetic or mathematic 12:39 finally, project is just as big and bloated and complex as anything that came before it. 12:39 repeat for the next 50 years. 12:39 XML is the lisp urge sublimated, etc. 10:40 i retrained myself to say zee because i got tired of people saying "are you canadian?" 10:39 cheese is sort of acceptable in a vampire context 15:11 because I am politically constrained from using a "real" message-passing system like pvm or mpi, I have implemented a general-purpose pvm-like message-passing system on top of rsync. 15:11 will I go to hell? 15:11 ARe you not already there? 15:11 Yes, but perhaps not for that reason 15:12 ttk: probably. 10:13 music editor: "I see the headline got changed. Please put me in the loop in the future. I did not want to change it. I'd rather not have these things being changed in the section I edit without my knowing." 10:13 I am only having a checkup and cleaning but I don't need two hours of my time diverted to that 10:13 first comment on the wired lhc article "Why do you paid 4 billion dollars ? It's god that had create universe !!!" 10:13 "Since it was the author of the article who asked me to change it, I feel pretty good about it." 10:14 my preciousssssssssss 12:53 Reading is for women and homosexuals 12:54 "...is for women and homosexuals" is one of the finest phrases i have learned in the last few years. so many uses. 10:10 > huh! Vecna is an anagram reference to Jack Vance. 10:10 > http://www.rpgdigest.com/2008/04/10/spell-names-in-dungeons-and-dragons/ * goldenmean refuses to admit he already knew that. 10:16 hot 10:16 23290752 page slots are required to track all free space. 10:16 well that's 177GB of leaked disk space 10:17 thanks, asshats 14:28 cow drama: christofer spent a month in county lock up and got deported. 14:28 he's in mexico now. he'll be back next week 14:28 legally? 14:28 hahahaha no. 14:43 all sendmail.cf files look like they should end with NO CARRIER 12:34 boggle 12:34 oracle open world: ten thousand guys named Raj eating boxed lunches under a tent in the middle of Howard St 10:30 wow. $1150/pair headphones. http://redirx.com/?0lln 10:31 when I read a review of $1150 headphones, I do not want to see the word "but" 10:36 http://www.dashingtweeds.co.uk/dt/?page_id=43 10:37 that.. is awful 10:37 it's like if a pimp and a chimney sweep had a child and dressed it while blindfolded 08:58 intellectual conservatism was always a fraud, i think 08:59 it was born from the problem that after ww2 it wasn't ok to be an outright nazi anymore 08:59 so the same people had to pretend to be way left of where they were standing 4 years earlier 09:00 i think of it kinda like the enlightenment in philosophy: a failed, disengenuous attempt to reconcile two incompatible things 17:08 archive.org is a misnomer :-P 17:08 who is this frankel fellow? 17:08 finding shit on archive is harder than generating MD5 collisions 12:57 it might just be our fucked-up plumbing; it was mostly done by the previous owner 12:58 (who was the same genius who wired the house up with 10A wires and 15A circuit breakers) 16:31 it's like bait and switch, but instead it's bait and HAHA FUCK YOU * sashie votes weezyl for change 16:40 My running mate will be this here glow-in-the-dark tentacle dildo 16:40 I call him "Mr. Squiddy." 16:40 When I am not around, Mr. Squiddy is in charge. 12:34 > The AP reports, "Republican presidential candidate John McCain seized on reports of record oil company profits Thursday to criticize Democratic rival Barack Obama for favoring tax breaks for the oil industry." 12:34 hahaha 12:35 The AP reports, "Republican presidential candidate John McCain claims that Democratic rival Barack Obama is an old white man with a rich wife and seven houses, and would make a horrible president." 12:36 if this election were to go on another month, we'd see that 14:49 sashie - JD once totally blew it with a girl because he told her her eyes were beautiful - like a seal jesus B&Bs are expensive. didn't I just spend months trying to get myself to blow this much on a stereo? <****> yep. the sex wouldn't be as good if they were cheaper, though. 21:34 leah's water broke 21:34 > woo! 21:34 > good luck! 21:34 and, given how awesome she is, it happened on the toilet! 14:06 and in amsterdam the local midwifery scene is concentrated in one neighborhood that is colloquially known as the "birth canal" 14:04 Saying that Java is nice because it works on every OS is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on every gender. 14:04 hmm i am not sure that analogy is exactly right 15:20 things you don't want to see in a patch: 15:20 - if (....) 15:20 + if (.... && bp < bufend) 16:56 I like how obama makes himself giggle 17:00 http://thinkprogress.org/2008/12/03/goler-question/ 17:00 the bit about billrichardson's beard. he treats it like a weighty international matter. and then he cackles. 12:48 I have never seen an actor that I instinctively want to punch more than the star of Entourage. 12:48 And I've only ever seen two commercials for the show. 12:49 He is like a smarm elemental. 17:11 this pill will make your penis harder using an ancient secret known as "rigor mortis" 08:34 from the ashes will rise a new chocolate company. for the people! 08:34 > I assume the factories and gear will still be there. 08:35 I wonder if they would just buy out the scharffenburger factory and start over 08:35 YOUR BLACK MUSLIM CHOCOLATIER 13:26 I'm a popular gal 13:26 it's either the boobs or my willingness to take it up the pooper 13:26 one of the two 09:07 because "poop in people's mouths" doesn't sell books <-- my cow on why it's called 'AGILE' 14:55 in 98 his schtick was being the antichrist, but he would get pissed off about something and quit forever for five minutes. I'd expect the antichrist to have thicker skin 09:12 today is one of those days where 'reservoir' feels spelled wrong 16:13 did i tell you about the dream i had involving 2 girls 1 cup only the substance was mac n cheese? 14:45 www, magnetism 09:27 another day, another coming into the office to find that my star wars figures and stikfas magically started raping each other. 14:52 jenn liked the name after rejecting all other star trek names. 14:53 i said it and she said she liked it and people didn't have to know it was chief o'brien's name. 16:15 my mind has begun scripting a bizarre bondage film centered around lime theft. 10:33 Pro tip: Don't put Emergen-C in sparkling water 10:33 oh man 10:33 Pro Tip #2: If you ignore the previous tip, don't do so at your desk. 10:33 what I wouldn't give for some emergency and sparkling water right now 02:02 I bought a Nextar GPS today, and will be returning it manana. 02:02 for it fails to play MP3's and Display Gps directions at the same time 02:03 And it told me to make a left from Geary to Park Presidio, which we all know to be complete crap 02:05 And I'm pretty sure they used an Asian lady for the "American voice" because she kept telling me to turn on Gealy street 03:27 please to be turning left onto gealy now. 03:31 why you miss that tuun? dat was good tuun. yoo suck 00:53 I'M A LITTLE TEAPOT / SHORT AND STOUT / HERE IS MY HANDLE / FUCK YOU 00:53 i think you have the last verse wrong 00:53 I think you can suck it 00:53 haha 00:53 I KNOW WHAT I SAID 17:39 what the hell is with online recipe people who boil meats and then grill them 17:39 is this some kind of widespread food safety hysteria? 17:41 here's a clue: if you buy chickens who didn't spend their lives beak-deep in shit, you're less likely to get some horrible disease 17:41 free bonus clue: salmonella is not a naturally occuring egg phenomenon 10:58 hey darren, my toilet won't stop running--i tried to fix it myself last night and i made it worse. the inside of my toilet is nothing like a normal toilet, either. i have no idea what the landlord's brother in law did to 10:58 it. it's like that scene in V where they look inside some dude and he's a lizard inside instead of a person 23:53 I was sitting out in the middle of the street with a flashlight and a camera when the rent-a-cop patrol drove by. they didn't stop 14:48 LANG=C is like the modern equivalent to the PC's "Turbo" button 10:40 I'm more cock-focused 10:07 > *looks at challah recipes* 10:07 > *almost types "hlaghl" instead of "challah"* 10:07 HAHAHAH 10:07 > damn muscle memory 10:07 HGLAGH GHLAGH NAGEELA HGLAGHLGH NAGEELA 17:42 i need an elephant cockring 10:47 once I was at henry's hunan and mentioned that my bike had a broken turn signal stalk, and the owner said "be right back!" and came back with onion pancakes and the correct replacement part 18:09 nothing wrwong with being curious 18:09 curious + confused is even better 18:09 curious + confused + drunk = come sit over here 10:16 amazon AWS introduces previously uncontemplated server management headaches 10:17 oh? how so, jwb? 10:18 it's like having a datacenter that you can't get in which also happens to have a bunch of rabid macaques running around turning the power on and off 17:37 i think i might just rename the baby Warning Advertencia Achtung Baker 17:37 every baby thingy in the house is plastered with warnings 12:28 RHEL is what GNU/Linux would be if you packed it in goose shit and buried it for a million years 10:56 fursuit in the corner, i know, i know.. it's serious 16:31 last: AN Orthodox Jew's prayer rituals, including wearing a sacred box on his head, has triggered a bomb scare on a US flight, a security source said. 16:32 jews are scary 16:32 i've heard they have horns! 16:32 and lay eggs. 16:32 I speak from personal experience when I say that their vaginas are sideways. 16:32 *nod*16:33 the sideways vagina aids in the egg laying. 16:33 cloaka 16:33 horny jew cloaca 16:33 Jews actually accumulate cloaca as they age. 16:33 In the nymph stage, they only have one. 16:33 But incredibly venerable jews can have as many as 6. 22:38 apparently we had a dos attack? 22:39 :( 22:39 now we have no tv and very limited internets 22:39 it's like 1900 House here 08:11 > this whole "seeing you across the breakfast table" thing is kind of addictive. 08:11 aw 08:12 don't get used to it, i'm going to antarctica 17:05 long is a booby trap 17:05 in this case it traps 2 or 34 bits, depending on your platform 17:05 if they had called it "maybe longer" then it would not be a trap 21:28 cock cookies? 21:30 the Lord seems like the sort of fellow who might appreciate cock cookies 11:35 i don't expect any modern tablet to ship with a wacom. 11:35 farmville doesn't need it. 10:12 i bet i don't really want to try using lynx on a 45 baud mechanical terminal 10:14 haha 10:14 sure you do 10:14 i did however find out that i can switch it to 100 baud, just by swapping two gears! 10:15 and it even came with the gears 10:15 i could become the first person to be seriously injured attempting to change a bit rate 10:15 "ow, bit 3 right through the thumbnail" 16:34 hussein hitler stalin. that'll be the boy's name. 16:35 But we call him "pol pot" for short 15:58 i heard the yelling thing works well for other dudes in your house 16:00 nah, just make sucky face. 16:03 Do we get food delivered in the same manner? 16:04 If Maggie can lactate enchiladas, I'm soooo there. * goldenmean manages to squick himself 18:13 hello from the cheese school 18:13 escuela de queso? 18:13 yay beer & cheese! 18:13 kaeseschule! 18:14 l'ecole de fromage 12:01 I'm never letting the front end developers manage a deployment ever again 12:01 They installed the software in their home directory 12:01 they went live with the admin password still the default (despite all of the warnings during installation) 12:02 they are 'backing up the database' by having it mail the sql to me every 12 hours 12:06 oh, yea. and they emailed that default password to me 15:51 > (07:50:23 PM) Anna: It's okay. I don't mind that you're all pretty and not much brains. 15:51 yay trophy fuz (02:23:06 PM) Anna: (I KNOW BEST FOR YOU. now take off your pants) (11:13:30 PM) Anna: Heh. Best Larry moment was having my exact marriage-dissing speech delivered to me while I stood in certainty of how much I and my perspective have changed. Irony on a stick. (11:14:00 PM) randomcamel: why was he giving you your marriage-dissing speech? (11:15:21 PM) Anna: I don't think he knew it was mine. He was trying to convice me that his plan was a good idea, because after all marriage is an outdated archaic meaningless thing that's just a convenience contract so why not marry him (11:15:56 PM) randomcamel: what's your view of marriage now? (11:16:26 PM) Anna: *fingers in ears* (11:16:30 PM) Anna: La la la la (11:16:32 PM) Anna: Lol 17:42 i accused the cto of trawling my linkedin connections for bald men and he said "it wasn't my idea" which only raises more questions 14:25 god dammit i just spent like 5 minutes using find and grep to figure out where i recorded a bunch of stuff and then noticed that i wasn't finding it because i actually wrote it on a piece of paper right next to my laptop 20:32 Maybe i read too much jerkcity, but i have a hard time taking a research paper seriously when the authors are Wang, Dong, and Barnaby. 16:14 the children who believe revision numbers should have no meaning are seeping into the project like vomit through a prom dress 11:01 hehe, a friend is sending in his dog's saliva to 23andme.com for one of the vials. He says it'll be control, to see what they say. :) 12:50 I hear they're going to come out with Grand Theft Identity on psn 17:21 ahh, the loadbalancer at our fine cloud hosting provider added the header: "Cneonction: closed" 17:21 (sic)? 17:21 FAQ. 1) Why has my cneonction closed? 17:21 yes bez 15:51 14:02 oh man, a whole host of bad monster movies on tcm tonight. 15:51 14:44 > lerp: which are you gonna watch? 15:51 15:47 phone: yes. 02:26 my final year of highschool gf had a wang word processor that took 8" floppies. no, really 17:01 so one of cobalt's snakes regurgitated a rat which had been digesting for the last week .. it was half-liquified, and quite pungent .. you'd think mopping it up out of the snake-tank and throwing it away would discourage appetite, but 17:01 instead it gave me an intense craving for sausages 09:07 yeah, not so much an anise fan 09:13 > yeah, not so much an anus fan 09:13 > GOOD MORNING WORLD 09:14 and *that* is why your imitations do not work, sir 09:15 I am *all about the anus* 09:15 Quote *that*, punk. ZOD DOES NOT NEED POLITICAL CAREER. 08:16 I suppose someone could write a pcre-based sed, but we already have one. it's called "perl" :-) *** martyf has changed the topic on channel #danger_expat to ENODMR /* Dennis Ritchie is no more. */ 07:47 Lions and tigers and bears, oh my: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2011/10/18/national/a170258D83.DTL&tsp=1 07:48 OCCUPY ZANESVILLE FOUR LEGS GOOD 21:06 fuz, you should turn on the iCloud auto-backup. 21:06 > it won't make things worse? 21:06 it's just a backup. 21:06 i has CLOUD in the fucking name 21:07 of course it won't be a problem 21:07 weren't you paying attention at cloud school? 12:29 my backpack ran out of ovaltine (for my coffee) and I forgot to restock it last night, so I went through its pockets looking for some splenda or something 12:30 didn't find splenda, but I did find a lot of other things of whose whereabouts I'd wondered: five sharpies, two tubes of toothpaste, a screwdriver set, a box of band-aids, and a spool of 40lb-test uhmw-hdpe line 15:25 > I'm having trouble picking questions for this phone interview 15:25 ooo chat can help!! 15:25 > he's an intern, so The Question is inappropriate. also I'd get fired. 15:25 "which do you prefer: two- or three- toed sloths? Please justify your choice." 15:26 > how many sloths are there in New York City? 15:26 > why are sloths manhole-shaped? 15:26 "Why are manhole covers sloth-shaped?" 15:26 hahahahahahaha 15:26 > ^5 15:26 *snort* 15:27 "Implement an efficient Viscous Tub Sort in the language of your choice, using only shifts and adds." 22:04 I remember a whole bunch of knowledge about Obama's church habits. 22:05 i think you misspelled "Mosque" 13:36 dammit, python 13:36 TypeError: mount() takes at least 5 arguments (5 given) 13:36 "it must have five! you gave it five! you gave it five but it needs *five*, not five! hoo-man is wrong!" 22:09 i really don't like hadoop 22:10 me neither, qq .. but it's sort of turned into the xml of distributed computing 12:52 I have a friend that used to get drunk and then combative. He was a black-belt in shotokan karate. We cautiously went drinking with him again, but my girlfriend and I brought fuzzy handcuffs, in case he went crazy again. 12:53 Generically, I stopped drinking with that group. Fighty McDrunkerson is supposedly okay if he doesn't get whiskey. 12:56 Several nights with that guy, he'd get in a fight at a bar, get us thrown out. One time he playfully kicked me in the solar plexus. 13:20 > wow. you couldn't pay me to go drinking with a karate black belt who gets violent. 13:21 > my black belt in aikido tells me that is a fucking stupid thing to do. =) 00:26 when i think of klout programmers i think of that scene in 'there's something about mary' where he gets his balls caught in his zipper 17:02 nerds. 17:19 what's the name of that anime with the aircraft carrier in space? 17:37 but that would make no sense. 17:38 Yamoto? 17:38 http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AirborneAircraftCarrier 17:55 robotech! 18:11 Macross 18:11 battlestar galactica 18:22 > Voltron, Space Version 17:38 _eric: dude 17:38 _eric: lulz @ antirez 17:38 _eric: talk about sticking your dick in a hornet's nest 09:52 kinda scary .. my site exists, in part, so people can be informed in how best to defend themselves .. but the thought of someone trying to operate an automatic grenade launcher when they can't even begin to *spell* it makes me uneasy 09:53 > man, ttk. 09:53 > you amaze me. I've never heard of anyone so interested in weapons and self-defense being simultaneously so optimistic about other humans. 09:55 haha 09:55 *giggle* 09:55 aw 09:56 > you have a genuine generosity of spirit in how you see other people's motivations and behavior, at the same time you always seem to be preparing for those people to attack you in your home with artillery. 15:33 the 18 year old Ardbeg was just too much salty wood for me 15:33 ...and that, folks, is how you type something and *then* read it over too late before hitting enter. 15:33 *headdesk* 15:53 TOO MUCH SALTY WOOD FOR ME 02:59 a kid in this looks like my foster dog 03:08 this movie has taken an unexpected turn 10:57 > or this, which I can't think of where I might have heard it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwrqAipON2w 10:57 > also, god damn if that is not an incredibly Russian piece of architecture there. 10:57 > huge, blocky, impregnable, with a church on top. 10:58 I want one 10:58 > :-) 10:58 ttk wants a church ? 10:58 > *heart* ttk 10:39 wow .. even after 1.5 years, it's always amazing when I can get sorting to work in python 10:39 ordered_list = sorted(([d[k]["load"], k] for k in d), key=lambda x: x[0]) 10:39 > SO MUCH MORE READABLE THAN PERL 10:39 > *spit* 10:39 fuz++ 10:39 why amazing? because that syntax is basically just idiomatic? :) 10:40 qq - yes, I feel like I'm reciting runes written in a forgotten language recovered from the bottom of the ocean with the wrong number of tongues in my mouth, and yet it closes the hellgate anyway 12:46 i'm pretty sure amanda palmer is just a high school drama club that achieved sentience and found a willing host 08:29 O_o such mixed feelings: The folks who run TankNet just made me (an anarchist) an administrator. 08:45 > haha 08:45 > sellout 08:46 didn't ask for this! But since I can, I'm going to keep an eye on the other administrators so they don't abuse their power. 08:56 > uh huh. embedded in the power structure, oppressing the disenfranchised, but when *you* do it it's *totally* for the common good. 08:58 > this is how it starts. first you're just a phpBB admin, supposedly oiling the gears of an online community. the barely-perceptible corruption of power continues for years, until one day you find yourself ruling a region of Somalia, shooting shopowners who don't pay your protection money. 08:59 > every now and again a lingering mote of conscience surfaces, to question whether you're doing the right thing. but that little voice gets shouted down, as you think to yourself, "I stopped the trolling. *I*. Stopped. The trolling." 13:24 spiffy, i didn't know this was possible: 13:24 12:43 < petong> mkfifo /tmp/pcap;ssh webhost "sudo tcpdump -i bond0 -s0 -w - port 80" > /tmp/pcap 13:24 12:43 < petong> wireshark -ki /tmp/pcap 22:12 i hate capitalism but i love venture capitalistss 22:12 that was fucking hard to type 09:33 i can't believe i typed that i loved venture capitalists last night 09:33 evidence of just how drunk i was 09:34 hahaha 09:35 i don't even know where i was 09:35 some fuckin vc's office with a full bar in the basement 09:35 > hahah 09:35 haha 09:35 > so easily bought! 09:35 hehe i'm a cheap date 10:09 yay Anna 10:09 intelligence is adapting the environment to one's needs. awesomeness is doing it with intelligence and a crowbar. 15:45 or i can bloody get around to scripting ffmpeg 17:57 > hahaha "scripting ffmpeg" 17:57 > people have built sustainable businesses around scripting ffmpeg 16:43 AssertionError: '[value out of range]' != '18-May-12584386 07:07:47pm GMT' 16:45 oo 13:51 ttk: also you should bring in an olinquito, the newly discovered animal from peru, which will distract them with it's adorable antics 13:52 though i take issue with the word "discovered" because the natives who live where it comes from have undoubtedly been eating them for millenia Dana: "I didn't start enjoying my life until I turned 27." 21:32 before enlightenment, yell and punch people in the face. after enlightenment, yell and punch people in the face. 22:24 it's a hadoop shop, they wouldn't know performance if it shit down their throats 16:58 on ICB, the technical term we use is "RFB" for "random fuckbag". 16:58 > EDGY 16:58 SMEARY 16:58 and the usual litmus test is The Question: "so, RFB, have you ever masturbated at work?" 16:59 yes? 16:59 wait. you weren't asking me. 16:59 most people I've seen asked will eventually fess up to doing so. 16:59 i presume sex workers don't count 17:00 nah, all the better. you can get an amusing story out of it, rather than a dull yarn about tumescence placated by a sock. 12:23 flu went viral before it was cool 13:07 crowley's thelema is like metaphysical homeopathy: an undetectably small dose of metaphysics diluted billions-to-one with bullshit 16:39 if you just switched to puppet you wouldn't have that issue. 16:39 > if you just switched to puppet wouldn't have issue you that. 09:52 slothoth 10:29 Yog-Slothoth? 10:33 slowly terrifying 09:38 as long as I stay out of ##slackware, I can pretend it's full of serious-minded, hard-hitting engineering and sysadmin types using it for mission-critical services and high-end data processing. 09:38 and not: 09:38 2014-05-01 09:35:49 ##slackware: have you guys tried to run starcraft? [10:03 AM] Adam Jacob: I made myself use windows 8 as my workstation for 6 months, and refused to install software that tweaked the experience [10:03 AM] Jay Mundrawala: who the fuck uses up down left and right haha why [10:03 AM] Adam Jacob: windows users, apparently because I wanted to understand what it was like to use windows, because I lacked empathy for my customers :) and because I lacked empathy, I also lacked elegant solutions [10:04 AM] Jay Mundrawala: i dont know [10:04 AM] Adam Jacob: and it made me feel bad, because I also want a scrooge mcduck sized pile of their money [10:04 AM] Jay Mundrawala: you would never force yourself to use gnome [10:04 AM] Adam Jacob: ;p I would if it was the default lived experience of a huge part of my customer base [10:05 AM] Jay Mundrawala: win+enter needs to bring up a terminal [10:05 AM] Adam Jacob: (I'm not arguing that windows was a great experience, just that I needed to understand it, and not mutate it) if I was going to actually live in that house for much longer, I would have started tweaking it (because I accomplished my first goal) :) 15:18 the thing is, the wall street assholes don't assume that anyone that doesn't work on wallstreet is subhuman 15:38 oh ffs i signed up for an ssl cert using the wrong email address and now its sending all the confirmation mails to the teletype machine 09:20 falling off the internet? no. well. it was me doing something dum 09:21 wanted to serve a continuous data stream via http to test something at work 09:21 thought it would be clever to make a cgi that just cats /dev/zero, and fetch it from remote machine 09:21 yeah apache tries to buffer the whole output 09:21 was halfway through typing the pkill command when it locked up hard 15:59 why females everywhere don't randomly spontaneously bellow HELL YEAH TITTIES a few times a day, i'll never know 15:59 i'm doing my part [9:28 AM] Chris: also, and I know this is a shock to most of you, computer nerds do not always have stellar social skills, and are sometimes apt to focus hard on the wrong aspect of a topic. [9:29 AM] Scott: @cdoherty i would not use apt in this case, I would use yum, your package manager is wrong. [9:30 AM] Chris hugs @shain Steve D: Everytime I try to use elisp, it feels like what lisp would be if you decided that you really just wanted to program by side-effect all the time 18:40 I remember wrapping presents for the dog/dogs 18:41 Me too! 18:41 Well, for the cats. 18:41 giant inbred walking carpet got a giant-ass rawhide bone for Christmas and spent most of the afternoon clotheslining himself because it was too wide for the hallway if he carried it evenly in his jaws 18:42 LOL!!! 18:42 eventually he figured it out, but until then... 18:42 Poor thing. 18:42 He was not the brightest of Great Pyrenees 18:43 bless his drooly heart 13:27 a corner case is an edge case of an edge case. 14:27 i'm interpreting their version of it as edge case = weird bug that might affect a few other customers vs corner case = only the weird fucking shows you work on are ever going to have this problem so we're keeping your bugfixes outside the main release in case they break something that the other guys depend on 16:57 erk: that's a pretty great way of thinking about th differnces between edge and corner cases. 16:57 typically, corner case fixes aren't included in the mainline because they can break other things. they are the evil 1% of problems that require 90% of the work to fix and/or account for. 16:58 if here was utf-128 then we could replace ipv6 addresses with a single character [9:44 AM] Justin S: Hello, Analytics! I've got a user who's looking for official documentation on configuring analytics webhooks. Any ideas? [9:45 AM] Allen G: http://www.amazon.com/Three-Testaments-Torah-Gospel-Quran/dp/1442214937 21:34 > anybody watching Agent Carter? 21:39 melissa does 21:42 i do. 21:48 i now pronounce you man and wife! 22:48 you're just giving her away? i would've called dibs. 22:59 i now pronounce you men and wives 23:08 what melissa and i have together is a love that needs no men 23:20 i now pronounce you wives and hidden cameras 23:21 that'll work 23:31 I'll be in my bunk. [1:53 PM] Christopher W: Is it wrong that I am excited to see folks that I caught up with at PuppetConf moving towards chef? [1:54 PM] Justin R: It is not wrong to be excited that others are making choices that mirror ones you made that have made you happy. [11:15 AM] Jay M: insurance is useless someone broke into my car and my deductible is too high :( [11:16 AM] K M: it's like boring gambling "The price of freedom--of individuality--is attention to politics, careful planning, careful organization; philosophy is no more a barrier against political disaster than it is against plague." -- Greg Bear, _Heads_ 11:21 I don't know why they called it age of ultron. it was more like long weekend of ultron. 16:40 hannibal s3 tonight! 16:41 he spun off from the a-team? 16:43 you didn't know? 16:43 he got embarrassed and lost face. From work, about ChefConf 2015: "What's Santa Clara like?" "It's a wasteland. Right when you would starve to death, you'll get run over by a Tesla." 15:23 HR decided to hire some guy named edward ng. guess what userid they let him have? guess what mailing list that conflicted with? 23:16 To those of you who told me to watch "Continuum" and that it was a great show and that I would love it: I have MANY opinions about this and your opinions and MOST OF THEM ARE ANGRY. 21:47 Also, it is helpful to remember that I have the same decorating sensibilities that I had when I was 20 and thought strings of christmas lights made fabulous lighting 21:47 and my one foray in solo living post-grad-school had me in a studio decorated in a style best described as "Hello Kitty Bordello" 16:53 "I need to delete this repo and start over" is my most common git workflow 11:53 the mesos ecosystem seems like someone rented a dump truck and drove through the city on big trash pickup day 11:32 oh, wow: http://quellish.tumblr.com/post/126712999812/how-on-earth-the-facebook-ios-application-is-so 11:32 "In the case of the Facebook [iOS] application, there are more than 18,000 functions in the application." 11:32 FBViewerNotificationsUpdateAllSeenStateMutationOptimisticPayloadFactoryProtocol-Protocol.h 11:32 you can't even make this shit up anymore 10:22 remoo 10:24 i'm looking up restaurant reviews where dad's hospital is 10:24 arby's got 4 stars 03:10 Tom Spindler is celebrating 4 years at Twitter 03:10 really? you're celebrating? 18:45 man i am wiped out 18:45 kids just never stop 18:45 if i ever had kids i would have locked them in a basement with a tv and frozen dinners until they turned 12 18:46 then send them to boarding school 14:47 I should be able to stretch that considerably with a few scripts 14:47 I can extend any problem with a few scripts! 14:47 haha 09:00 haha 850W bike light 09:00 increases traction by softening the pavement in front of you 17:12 I was never a teenage girl, but I think my default is going to just be assuming that Miranda is masturbating whenever she's out of my sight in a dozen plus years. 17:13 Or maybe very very subtly masturbating while she's in my field of vision. You never know. 12:34 NOC folk found an orphaned VM doing nothing but calling one of our test lines and recording its hold music 12:35 for about a year, apparently 12:35 nobody's fessing up to knowing anything about it 10:34 Why did the Perl engineer look sad? 10:34 It was just his regular expression. 09:05 my brother in law says he know's he's acclimated to chicago because he describes things that are no longer there in terms of other things that are no longer there. 19:07 holy crap i hate systemd 19:08 i had a process that does some stuff in DB2 launched from systemd and it apparently thought it was a grand idea to delete all the shared memory for DB2 on me when that process exits. 19:10 who cares if that shared memory pre-existed the process. wasted around 5 days on this before i was able to narrow it down enough, and even then i only found the option to turn off that braindead feature by reading the code for systemd :/ 19:11 i seem to recall swetland was violently opposed to systemd-like proposals for Android 19:12 it's about the most elegant designed pneumatically driven studded ass dildo you can install on linux 19:12 unfortunately, the documentation, while present, is about as useful as a label "CAUTION: puppies" on said dildo 12:25 do you know about bash 'while' loops? yes! while true ; do ping -c1 host ; done 12:25 do not do that. 11:33 did i tell you guys about the time huawei showed up at the office with a free router they wanted us to plug into our lan? 10:51 > ouch. "Docker is the PHP of infra." 10:51 hahaha 10:52 it sort of is, in the "hey i can just slap together a bunch of stuff i don't understand and have it look like it works" sense 10:53 So what libc versions are in use in all your prod docker containers, and have they all been patched against the latest vulnerability? huuh? 10:54 the funny part is the "developers" are all "huuh? that's a thing?" and the docker evangelist group says "haha not my problem, that's for the developers to worry about!" 10:54 fsvo "funny" 05:25 RWC.... Road Warrior Combat? I can imagine it's tough to navigate a hellish post-apocalyptic nightmare of half ruined roads and psychotic biker gangs while towing a yacht *** The time is 06:00 *** The time is 07:00 07:37 > it's pretty grim here, it's true. 07:38 > at least down here on the flats. alibee lives in one of the gated fortresses in the hills, defended by minefields and concertina wire. 07:49 i've never seen a fortress than can defend against joibear's Ursine Marauders *** The time is 08:00 08:44 > motion-tracking gun placement technology has come a long way in the past couple years. 08:45 she burrows! 08:45 you need steel reinforce flooring 08:53 > alibee put that in after the Mole People incident in 2013. 08:54 she may have a slim chance of repelling joibear in the short term, then 08:55 what does she have to counter joibear's unnatural ability to fling herself into the air across large distances? 08:58 You guys are silly. 08:59 cdoherty: see why i'm concerned? 08:59 resistance is futile. i will devour your faces while you scream! *** The time is 09:00 09:01 And hilarious. 09:02 i laugh at your tears while i dine on your face meats 09:03 disturbing stuff 09:03 cdoherty: did you know that joibear is the world's only self-defined "faceitarian"? 09:04 kittens, rainbows, hearts and unicorns! 09:04 all shall fall to my unquenchable hunger! 09:04 <3 you, sheeps. * sheeps <3 his precious face meats 15:12 > sup oao 15:12 yo! 15:13 > are you in the book trailer for Anathem? I just re-watched it and it seemed like it must have you involved somehow. 15:14 i am, maybe 2x 15:14 one of the hooded people, for which i was in two scenes i think 15:14 i was also in the fight scene but i think my part in that got cut 15:14 (and i was physically present for almost the entire filming, i think) 15:22 ..book trailer? 15:22 like the old bookmobiles? 15:23 *oao* i'm definiltely not erasmus! (i don't think) 15:23 *oao* (i don't think laura is likely to have actual hard info on that, but maybe she knows something i don't) 15:23 -> *oao* no, Erasmas didn't resonate, but I haven't followed up with her. just occurred to me it could have been someone else, and then Lio was the obvious choice. 15:24 *oao* i remember reading it and really thinking how much i liked lio, and then.. oh wait, could this be me? 15:24 -> *oao* heh 15:24 book trailers are a thing now 15:24 publishers create them as promotional tools (of course) 15:25 apparently they are HUGE in romance novels 15:25 but what about in a time that is not now? 15:25 like, a short video telling you there is a book? 15:25 this is real and you're not fucking with me? 15:25 which i understand from my pal brady hall (who made the anathem one) 15:25 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWs1h5WAjWY 15:25 watching this i realize that i was singing on this also 15:25 it's over two minutes long!! 15:26 who the heck watches a video to find out a book is out? 15:26 the book is even longer, erk 15:26 i also did the orth calligraphy for the title cards 15:26 i just find out when amazon tells me 15:26 which are translations of the english words in the foreground 15:26 of course i also did the translation and invented the language 15:26 i guess i was pretty involved 15:27 i saw myself at 1:47 22:25 badgerbadgerbadger 22:32 snaaaaaake 22:33 here is a great story! many years ago maciej and poohbear went to some o'reilly conference 22:33 all the rooms had labels on teh doors with different o'reilly animals 22:33 overnight they changed them all to badgers, with an occasional snake 22:34 then they just laughed their asses off listening to people walking down the hall saying "badger...badger...badger...snake" 20:55 Student responded: "Well, since he already signed off on the document I don't think I have to worry too much about his comments." 20:55 she ain't wrong 20:56 back at it tomorrow morning, then 20:59 I refrained from saying "you had me at 'already signed off,' everything else is above my pay grade" 09:28 when there is a fly buzzing at the window i hold my dog up like a dustbuster and he eats it. 15:13 i was not designed for this :( 15:13 i dunno, 150 megs across tftp shouldn't be more than a couple days 15:13 i was not designed so much as shat into being 08:05 lilith used to sweetly sit on my chest in the morning and receive her tribute of scritches before i got up 08:06 but since tenzing showed up, she's been too busy protecting her turf (the entire bed), and ends up just pacing over me on her patrol from the eastmarches to the westlands 21:15 that was a crazy conversation with my dad 21:15 "really, she was CIA?" "oh, she was big time CIA." "like, has she killed people?" "oh no, no, but i'm sure that people who worked for her did." 05:52 day N of fighting this 05:52 $ docker ps -a 05:52 Error response from daemon: client is newer than server (client API version: 1.24, server API version: 1.23) 08:53 oh good a bomb scare 08:56 someone dumped a pressure cooker outside goodwill 08:56 now sfpd is shutting down everything 09:06 i'm waiting for pressure cookers to become hard to buy 09:07 the New Threat 09:07 yeah surely they will become contraband 09:08 either that or people will just start leaving empty pressure cookers around everywhere to cause havic 09:08 only a CRIMINAL would want to make risotto without stirring 09:09 haha 09:09 These beans are so good, they're TERRORISTIC 09:10 pressure cooker + trump bumper sticker = instant evacuation 20:51 get a combo n2/no2 tank. "some for the van, some for me!" 20:55 no2 would be pretty rough on the lungs 20:55 perhaps you mean n2o :) 20:55 unless you enjoy recreational nitric acid formation 17:13 Inbox trick someone taught me and I can't find the article they wrote on it 17:14 Create some filters: Newer than 1 week, older than 1 week/newer than 2 weeks, older than 2 weeks/newer than 3, older than 3/newer than 4, and older than 4. 17:14 I called them "Fresh, Moldy, stale, Rotten" 17:15 The older than 4 rule auto-archives 17:15 Anything you don't get to in a month, you're never gonna get to. Just let it go. 17:15 Really worked out for me, ymmv. 18:27 oh so mission secret: the Punjab Restaurant on 24th/bryant has really good pho! don't try anything but the vietnamese food, though 18:27 the american and chinese food sucks 18:27 what about the punjabi food 18:27 none! 18:27 haha 18:28 halal in the streets, hanoi in the sheets 16:09 oof. my dog walker just texted asking if he walks the dogs today 16:09 i probably shouldn't have paid him in pot 10:56 mmm ETL 10:56 Extract, Transform, LOL. 15:43 | TIL: the "S" in "IoT" stands for "Security" 15:15 oh why did before-xmas me schedule a meeting for me to lecture programmers about not putting ssh private keys in their code 15:16 that was back when you still had hope in the future. 15:16 oh right 09:48 what's super weird to me is people who have no problem throwing down over sports teams or 'talking shit' are somehow pacifists when it comes to an actual nazi 09:49 like, you'll punch a guy for not liking your pitcher but when someone's calling for genocide well that's different and we must respect his right to free speech? 17:55 1: Google creates SHA1 collision between two PDFs. 17:55 2: Responsible Webkit devs decide they need a test to make sure that a SHA1 collision doesn't break their browser cache. 17:55 3: They commit the two PDFs to their repository as a part of writing their test. 17:55 4: Their Subversion breaks hard. 18:01 0svn: E200014: Checksum mismatch for [...] shattered-2.pdf'" 10:32 systemd sucks so much 10:32 it makes me sad 10:33 i discovered another terrible behavior/bug in it yesterday 10:34 it somehow remembers and associates mountpoints with processes 10:34 and overrides fstab 10:36 i lost a disk so i shutdown zoneminder and graphite, unmounted the disk, restored to the underlying filesystem, commented the mount out of fstab, and restarted them. all good. 10:36 then i unplugged the disk and reconnected it. Systemd somehow noticed this and *remounted it* on top of the live directories the running processes were using. 18:36 i think my emergency response kit will consist of a flashlight and the battery powered sawzall 18:36 using that i can get anything else i need, haha 15:27 I am going to start sending out emails with the salutation "Hey Gals". Perhaps that might hit home to people that "Hey Guys" is poor choice. 15:44 "sup my neckbeards" is an excellent greeting. 11:32 i've never worked in a mongo shop 11:33 we have hidden mongo somewhere i think but nobody pays any attention to it 11:34 we have a jenkins like that 11:34 *horror* 11:34 oh yes we also have that 11:35 one of our stats whizzes misuses it as fancy-cron 11:35 please don't break my black magic 11:35 there are also like 4 or 5 different mystery zookeeper clusters that were set up by devs who later quit 11:35 "better keep it running, it might be holding crucial service state" 11:35 haha yay, another dev here asked "what's cron? is that like jenkins?" 11:36 well the zookeeper clusters probably keep the mystery hbase clusters working 11:36 it's like jenkins but the timing is more accurate 11:36 and it doesn't break, but if it did, it would be easy to figure out and fix 11:37 really, the definition of jenkins here is "thing that uses passwordless ssh keys to run commands on other hosts instead of using local cron jobs" 12:33 I did an evil hack of playing the video with VLC while a dtrace script was logging the block number of each access to /dev/cd0 and use that log to write a file telling ddrescue which sectors it needed to copy and skip the others. 14:59 #perl: "Docker: You can just put your bad practices in a container" 20:45 > possible best article title of the month: http://stringsmagazine.com/the-search-for-the-vegan-violin/ 21:21 because what violin player need is to have qualities that make them even more insufferable. Burn Notice (s6 finale?): "Imagine that you're holding on to two bottles and they drop on the floor. What happens? They both break. But it's how they break that's important. Because, you see, while one bottle crumples into a pile of glass, the other shatters into a jagged-edged weapon. You see, the exact same environment that forged older brother into a warrior crushed baby brother. People just don't all break the same, Mrs. Westen. Just don't." "Them as can do has to do for them as can't. And someone has to speak up for them as has no voices." -- Terry Pratchett, The Wee Free Men 23:36 23:29 someone posted in r/AcademicBiblical 23:36 23:29 "How accurate is the history in Jesus Christ Superstar?" 23:36 23:30 best answer was 23:36 23:30 "Very accurate, iirc Andrew Lloyd Webber was a primary source for Mark and Josephus and JCS is typically dated to 40 AD." 13:41 ttk, you should just reply to all comments with "scala does it better." 13:41 heheh 13:41 hahaha 13:41 you should make up a nonexistent language name every time the opportunity presents 13:41 and be all snooty about saying "oh, you don't know about that yet? heh nm" 13:41 hahaha 13:42 I'm glad you're nice, because you're really good at being mean 16:52 stop changing your damn interface! it doesn't matter, since you have hundreds of technician humans using our service, right? no, just a bunch of perl scripts wat 16:55 wait, aren't you telling them they can change their interface any time they want, since you only need to update your scripts? 16:56 i mean, not intentionally. but they might misinterpret that way. 16:56 I don't doubt they misinterpret it -some- way, since afaict they fail to comprehend the situation entirely 16:56 all of their other customers have large teams of humans using their services 16:57 when I try to tell them we've got it automated, I get nothing back, or non sequitors 17:00 maybe just tell them you manage a team of blindly obedient, but very literal technicians.