it doesn't have to make sense to be real.

I'm feeling much better, but still very busy and sleepy, so I've been going to bed (and cutting corners on my evening rituals) instead of a writing a journal entry to tell the world (whoever you are, and whether you care or not) that I've been feeling better for a few days now. Maybe I should add a disclaimer somewhere:

This information subject to change without notice. No, really. I mean it. I know you don't think it would ever actually happen and so you'll just assume that the last thing I wrote is still how I feel, but honestly, it changes and you don't find out about it. There. You've been warned. Anxiety on your part is officially your problem and not mine.
I don't know how worried people get. Don't sweat it. It's always better than junior high school, but above and beyond that now with this wonderful gift I've found, even when life is ass there's still the shimmering immediacy of every moment--that never goes away, it's just that I have to look at the world the right way, kind of like if I tilt my glasses everything gets all distorted and the perspective is messed up, but if I put them on straight I can see the world clearly.

This morning I drove across the San Mateo Bridge in the most beautiful perfect sunlight with no traffic and one of my favoritest songs ever ("Every Little Kiss" by Bruce Hornsby), which I listen to about every day, came on the radio, and the car just drove itself as I felt all the little bumps in the road and there are times when I can tell that the world is brand new every instant--as Shunryu Suzuki said, "Every time we stand up".

I saw the most wonderful license plate today:

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    | DIOS ES |
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(Spanish for "God is".)


Chris